IN THESE STONES

Worshipping Missional Communities

2011-06-01T21:23:00.003+01:00

I'm currently getting my vision of what Church should be radically reshaped by the Holy Spirit. And I'm loving what He's teaching me.

A people of praise

The Church is first & foremost a worshipping people. Our identity is completely rooted in the gospel, for "once we were not a people, but now we are God's people; once we had not received mercy, but now we have received mercy" to be "a chosen race, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, a people for his own possession, that we may proclaim the excellencies of Him who called us out of darkness into His marvelous light" (1 Peter 2:10, 9). Christ died at calvary, bearing our sins and the wrath of the Father, in order to save a people for His own treasured possession that they may joyfully make much of Him forever. That's the gospel. And that people that He has rescued is the Church. Chosen, royal, holy and His. If we are to be the Church God has called us to be, we have to come to terms with the glorious truth that He has saved us for His praise. It's not just for our eternal security and joy with Him in the new heavens and the new earth. It's ultimately for the praise of His glorious grace. Therefore, the consummation of the gospel, as seen in revelation, is the joyful praise of the redeemed before the throne of their Risen Saviour. This is why the Church exists. For His glory.

A people together

Secondly, the Church is a people who are together. Through the gospel we have become God's family. This may be obvious, but God is radically re-applying this truth to my heart right now. Ephesians 2 says that through the cross, Christ didn't just accomplish our salvation from darkness to light so that we may praise Him, He has also "broken down in his flesh the dividing wall of hostility" making us collectively into "one new man" (Ephesians 2:14-15). The cross is the centre of God's plan to reconcile all things to Himself (Colossians 1:19) and in doing so He has also reconciled brothers and sisters to each other when once they were at enmity. For those who trust in Christ as Saviour and Lord they are adopted into His family. We together are the people of God. Because of this, God wants us to act like family. Not just "going to Church" or "doing Church" but rather, being Church. His desire is that we live like Acts 2:42-47, giving our lives away for one another, revealing the good news to the world through our love for one another. All communities, by their very name, are built upon common interests and pursuits of the members. We are to be the community of all communities because we have the greatest thing in common of all! We have a common hope, a common faith, a common Saviour, a common home and a common name. We are His, collectively.

A people on mission

Finally, the Church exists to be a people on mission. When Christ ascended into heaven after the resurrection, His command to His disciples was not consolidation but multiplication. The call to "make disciples" (Matthew 28:19) worked itself out in the book of Acts through two primary means - (1) Spirit empowered preaching (2) Church planting. The mandate of Jesus to His chosen people is that they, as testimonies of His saving power and grace, may be witnesses to the rest of mankind of His goodness and glory and thus bring Him others who will repent and believe.

The glorified Church

The staggering thought in all of this is that we are going to be worshipping and in community forever. Our fellowship with God (worship) and our fellowship with each other as believers in Christ (community) will NEVER cease. It will be perfect worship and perfect fellowship, unstained by sin, satan and death. Perfect reconciliation. What an amazing thing.

However, we will not always be a people on mission. This life is it. Worship will remain, community will remain but mission will cease. There will be a day when the Great Commission is fulfilled and Christ gathers God's family to Himself. The truth of this makes our identity as a people on mission all the more urgent. So many churches are so content with being a worshipping community. We love our Church gatherings where we can sing, study the bible, pray, enjoy fellowship and receive ministry. But we are less concerned about the lost, about the urgent call of Jesus to MAKE disciples and not just BE disciples. God's heart for His Church is that we be a people sent into the world, equipped with His truth and empowered by His Spirit to proclaim the gospel to those who are not yet saved. We are to call haters of God into a worshipping relationship with their Maker and a loving relationship with His children. We are to call them out of darkness into His light to join the people of praise who together bring Him glory. We are to be a people on mission, winning souls and making disciples.

Worshipping Missional Communities

I need this holistic vision of Church to wake me up from a consumeristic, complacent, apathetic and selfish view of God's people. Worshipping Missional Communities are God's number one plan to see souls saved and the Church established. Lets give our lives to being the Church He wants.

What would it look like for you to waste your life?

2011-04-11T12:50:00.004+01:00

Only one life, ’twill soon be past, only what’s done for Christ will last.

These words have been haunting me recently. I am unusually aware at the moment that "my days are like an evening shadow" (Psalm 102:11) and that my life is like "a flower of the field; for the wind passes over it, and it is gone" (Psalm 103:15-16). So often I have heard the older generation almost unwillingly recount how quickly it seems time has passed since they were in their early twenties. If I'm honest, it partially scares me that before I know it I could be 60 (if the Lord chooses to give me that long!)

This fresh awareness is God's grace to me in this season where I have to make choices about the shape of my life in future days. I don't want to float. I don't want to get carried along by the wind of culture. I don't want to be shaped by the way other people think I should spend my money, time, words & affections.

I want to be shaped by God's word, by His heart, by His priorities & passions. I want to be carried along by the power of His Spirit. And I want to intentionally give my life for the cause of the gospel, counting my life as nothing if only I might have the sheer joy of testifying to the grace of God (Acts 20:24). I don't want to settle for second best. I want Christ. He is the treasure worth giving life for. His fame is my joy. And His gospel is my cause.

If only the Church would get a glimpse of the shortness of this life & the surpassing worth of Christ Jesus, their Lord & Saviour (Philippians 3:7-8). That's an awakening worth praying for.

And when I am dying, how happy I’ll be, if the lamp of my life has been burned out for Thee.

Past Grace, Present Grace, Future Grace

2011-04-11T00:14:00.004+01:00

It's been quite sometime since I last posted on this blog. I want to share some of what the Lord has done & has been doing in this season of my life. His faithfulness never ceases to blow me away.

PAST GRACE

One piece of relatively old news now is that I'm getting married to the love of my life, Charlotte. I get the privilege, honour & joy to serve this woman of God in covenant love for the rest of my days. My example is Christ, who laid down His life in love for His bride. I trust that in some small measure that He will give me all I need to do the same for her & display the infinite glories of the gospel to the watching world.
University is coming to an end. He gave me a vision for my time as a student that by His grace He has helped me partially fulfil. My failings have been many. His mercy has been abundant. Some of the friendships I've made in my last 3 years have been incredible & I am so thankful for the men & woman God has put in my path who share a passion for the gospel. I pray that some of these friendships will last my lifetime.
I recently handed over my responsibilities in running Revive. What a privilege that was. Getting to fire up a bunch of Christ-loving believers who were willing to give their lives in mission for their King was an immense joy. I can only hope that God in His sovereignty allows me the privilege of equipping others for mission in the future. I feel alive when doing it.

PRESENT GRACE

Charlotte & I are currently seeking the Lord on what He wants for us in this next season. In this process of waiting upon Him, He is faithfully growing in me a stronger dependence on Him & His provision. He's testing & purifying my motives & revealing little snippets of what He has for our future. It's exciting, humbling & challenging to trust His timing.
I am feeling an increasing call to preach at the moment. Its amazing to trace back over the last few years what God has done in the desires of my heart. One of the new things that has emerged in the last year and a half is a sense that I'm called to be pastor. Its totally in His hands & I'm totally up for being wrong on this one. But as the burden to preach & lead & shepherd increases so it seems does the affirmation from others. We'll se what happens on that front I guess.
I am loving my dissertation. I get to write thousands of words on the 18th century Great Awakening in Wales. So good. I'm studying the growth of Calvinistic Methodism, the role of Howell Harris in particular & the specific devotion that was manifest amongst the Methodist exhorters. Its been really good for me in putting in me a deep sense that I want to give my life for these things; building the Church, reaching the lost & making disciples.

FUTURE GRACE

As we look forward into the uncertainties of the next year (jobs, house etc.) we are confident of this - God is on the throne, the gospel is sufficient & the Spirit will keep us burning with passion for Christ.
We have a profound sense at the moment of the urgency of living out true, radical Christianity, being a people of mission, worship & community. We don't want to waste our lives. Pray that this sense would go beyond thoughts & be manifest in our actions & decisions on a life level.
Finally, we're trusting God would provide money & a house for marriage. It's so good to know that our Father in heaven ALWAYS provides for His children. Nothing like it.

Celebrating past grace, depending on present grace, expectant of future grace.

Revive Blog.

2010-06-02T21:46:00.000+01:00

Going to hopefully pick blogging back up by God's grace here...

http://revivewales.co.uk/blog/

How time flies.

2010-04-23T16:49:00.002+01:00

Just found this on my computer. It was made about 2 years ago as I had just finished my internship in St Aldates and was hoping to record a few songs I'd written while in that season and get out copies of the CD to friends and family as a means of blessing them and sharing all God had taught me by His grace through a tough time. Never got round to doing that, in fact never got beyond the paragraphs below! But even these few sentences have reminded me of the steadfast goodness and faithfulness of the Lord. So I just thought I'd share!

JULY 2008
Hey, this is Owen, I’m recording a bunch of songs I’ve written over this last year in oxford. They’re just songs that have helped me love my Jesus, pour out my praise to Him and express my pain, my joy, my struggles, my battles, my affection and my journey to the One who is faithful and true through all of it. They’re nothing special, but I pray that as they have helped me so much in dwelling in His presence and hiding in Him through hard times, so they will help His people to connect with Him and touch Him and find Him altogether beautiful for them in their times of trial. I’m going to be writing a journal just to chronicle the process.
I just want to say a little bit about the heart behind this collection of worship songs. Each one has its own story, which I’ll say a bit about as I’m recording them. These songs have come out of a season where I’ve been working full time for the church, leading people in worship about 5 times a week at various events and wrestling with what it means to be a worshipper through battles, loss, doubt, confusion and hunger. It’s been intense. It’s been hard. The road has truly been narrow. I’ve learned so much about my frailty. But, though the way is hard, still we sing. Still we lift our eyes and hold our breath and give Him our all. Even when we can’t see, even when we feel like we’re drowning and the enemy has us backed up to the wall. Still we sing. Still we get down on our knees and lift our hands. Still we rejoice. We keep loving Him because His word says ‘love never gives up’. Love perseveres, it trusts, it hopes, it holds on. When fears come near and our flesh takes over, worship and prayer releases faith and boldness to face the foe. He never gave up on us. He never gives up on us. He is always patient and good. He came to the lowest place just to capture our hearts and bring them home. That is the gospel. His love. His mercy. GRACE. And that grace when received cannot be held in- it has to find its way out. He revives our hearts and raises the dead in us so that we can be a city on a hill, shining for Him in this broken world. This is the heart behind this bunch of melodies and words. Put simply – love finds us in the darkest place, lifts us out, sets us on a rock and gives us a new hymn of praise to sing to our Saviour that all the world may believe He lives. He is Strength in our weakness. He is Joy in our sadness. He is Righteousness in our sinfulness.
All of the songs together are going to be titled “HOPE BEYOND” I think. The phrase comes from the 4th track, “Hope of the world” which is all about salvation and the call for us as the Bride of Christ to show the lost the unending, undying, never failing love of God. The lyric it comes from is actually the first line…’hope beyond the grave has come’. I love that thought. The bible says that we have Christ in us, and that is the hope of glory. We have the hope of glory living in us. A hope that goes beyond pain, beyond trials, beyond failures, even beyond death. That hope is Christ Jesus, living in us, His Fathers adopted sons and daughters. If we are going through tough seasons, we can be sure that in Jesus there is hope beyond our present valleys. There is deliverance, healing, restoration, and protection. All in the One we call Savior. This hope is for us as God’s saved people in our need, but it’s also for the whole world that needs to know our Father.
So that’s the story behind these songs. I pray that they centre other people on the truth of God’s love and help them as much as they have served me.

I cling to You

2010-03-18T22:09:00.001Z

Father in heaven
Sovereign of all
Faithful forever
Close when I fall

Jesus, Great High Priest
I rest in Your grace
Though storm clouds come over
In You I am safe

I cling to You
I cling to You
when all my heart and flesh have failed
I cling to You

Spirit of Comfort
Bringing me peace
Come now and fill me
You're all I need

You are more than able
You're the ever faithful God
I cling to You

twitter.com/owencottom

2009-12-24T14:33:00.004Z

i've just joined a little site called 'twitter'. the idea of it is that is gives you 140 characters to write whats going on in peoples worlds right then - what they're doing, thinking about, enjoying etc. i'm going to use it as an incredibly shortened version of this blog, posting hopefully more regularly about what the Lord's teaching me, whats on my heart, what i'm praying about and reading etc. after having had quite a busy and hectic term, i've found blogging at length increasingly hard so hopefully twitter will help me in putting whats on my heart in a much shorter form. i pray that it will still be a blessing to any who read it in their own walks with Jesus and will fan into flame more passion and devotion to Him and His Kingdom.

i'll still be blogging at greater length on here when i feel led and have the time!

"whatever you do (whether blogging or twittering), do all to the glory of God." 1 corinthians 10:31

www.twitter.com/owencottom

church on a hill without windows.

2009-11-10T00:05:00.000Z

give God the time and space to speak to His children and He will rise with eagerness at the opportunity and whisper with excitement the secrets of the Spirit in their ears. He loves to communicate with His people. He loves to release the transforming power of His voice into their lives. the voice that rose lazarus from the dead, the voice that spoke creation into being, the voice that instructed confused disciples, the voice that comforted the widow, the voice that shakes the temple, the voice that stills the storm, the voice that sounds like the roar of a waterfall, the voice that will one day come forth from heaven like the sound of a trumpet blast, announcing the reign of God's Kingdom and presence with the ones He has saved. this is the voice that speaks to our hearts when we, in faith, take time out to be still before Him and listen.

over the last few months, my Father in heaven, in His beautiful grace, has chosen to call my ears to attention to hear the whispers of His heart. by His Spirit He reveals the secrets of His covenant (1 corinthians 2 vs 10) to those who fear Him (psalm 25 vs 14). there is nothing like hearing the voice of the Father. it awakens love like nothing else. His word is so precious - like daily sustenance. there is no greater privilege in heaven or on earth than being intimate with Him.

what He spoke has rested and seeped into my heart over the past few months as i've seen Him confirm it many times, to many people in many ways. the overflow of His heart to me, in essence, was His overwhelming, jealous desire for a pure, passionate bride. it started as i was worshipping in my room one day back a few months ago. rain started to splatter against my bedroom window, and i felt the Lord reveal to me that my posture in that moment was like much of His church in this nation and other nations in the world. sitting down. comfortable. warm. content. apathetic. and most of all, dry. as the rain continued to hit the window, i felt God's heart so strongly for His people. we in the west so often live in comfort and compromise. we live behind the false protection of possessions, satisfaction in the world, safety and entertainment. these things are like a window. we can sit so comfortably in our churches, in our lives, in our relationships, in our time, in our resources, just watching the rain of God's presence hit the window without ever experiencing the power and impact of it. we are afraid of being soaked. we are afraid of being wrecked. we are afraid of being exposed to such glorious light and truth that it will cause us discomfort, suffering and will mess up our daily routine.

even as i write this i am convicted. how can i say "we" when i know that all of this starts with me. i too often am way too willing to sit behind the protection of all sorts of fail safes rather by living in complete faith, abandon and surrender.

a few days after this happened, me and my beautiful girlfriend were driving home from a day out when we decided to stop at a place called burrow mump. burrow mump is essentially the old ruins of a church building on top of a hill, overlooking beautiful countryside. we climbed up the hill and had a time of prayer and worship at the top of this mound, inside the old church ruins. as i stood in the east end of the church, facing the setting sun, praying and singing to Jesus, a strong wind picked up, accompanyed by light rain. i stood there, literally unable to speak, both due to the overwhelming presence of the precious Son of God and the crazy strong wind! it was as if the Father was saying "this is the alternative". this church had no windows. no protection against wind and rain. it had been ruined. it was defenceless against all sorts of weather. but that meant that when you were in the building, you fully experienced that weather.

we are to be like that church building. ruined by the love of Jesus. defenceless against the wind of the Spirit and the rain of His presence. a church on a hill without windows. He longs for a people who He can soak with His goodness and will, even if it means leading them through suffering and trials. i want to be one who constantly exposes himself to the full force of the presence of the Lord. not protecting myself from His glory with the windows of this world. all for His honour and pleasure.

Rock of Ages.

2009-09-04T23:54:00.006+01:00

this summer has been full. the Lord has blessed, taught, broken, wooed and refined me so much over the last few months. He is so good. unfortunately there hasn't been much time in the intensity of it to write blog posts but i'm getting back on track for a new season now. a thousand blog posts couldn't contain all that my Gracious Heavenly Father has been doing in my life over this summer. but in the midst of all the "new paths" (isaiah 42 vs 16) He leads His people to and through, and in the midst of Him "always working" (john 5 vs 17), there is one truth and one hope that will always anchor both storm battered saints and abundantly blessed children of the King. He is The Rock of ages.

^"3 I will proclaim the name of the Lord;
how glorious is our God!
⁴ He is the Rock; his deeds are perfect.
Everything he does is just and fair.
He is a faithful God who does no wrong;
how just and upright he is!"
(deuteronomy 32)

in the midst of economies failing, families deteriorating, nations raging and illness threatening there is One who stands above it all, unshaken, unmoved and safe. that is the Source of so much courage, hope, comfort, rest and strength for so many precious, beloved people of the Kingdom who are too often captives to worry and fear. He is calling His people into a fresh place of communion and trust in Him, through which He will show Himself to be the Rock who never fails.

He isn't a tame Lion. He's unpredictable. His ways are higher, His thoughts are deeper. His leading is often mysterious and His paths of righteousness often lead us into the valley of the shadow of death (psalm 23 vs 3-4). His ways are called "perfect" and everything He does is called "just and fair" despite the fact that His ways often lead us to trial, suffering and even death (luke 14 vs 27). but He's safe and He knows whats best for His children. i love how proverbs 18 calls even the name of the LORD, Yahweh, "a Strong Tower" where "the righteous run in and are safe". even the very utterance of His name is a safe place of Shelter in dark, stormy nights and times of tragedy.

i just watched a film about 9/11 and was moved so deeply by the heart wrenching pain that must've been felt by the family of the victims of that tragic event as they heard of the death of their loved ones. the shock that suffering of that intensity places on the soul is unbearable, apart from The Rock. none can survive without His Eternal Shelter. i for one am to weak to live without the One who welcomes me into His name when life falls apart. and the beautiful thing is that my life is hidden with Him above (colossians 3 vs 3) where nothing can destroy or harm me (luke 12) so my life can never fall apart because it is hidden in the Rock.

what is most incredible about the revelation of God as our never failing Rock is that He is not distant and dull, simply providing protection and a foundation when all else fails. He is the Living One who calls all His people not only to stand on Him but to cling to Him; not only to trust in Him but to run to Him. 1 peter 2 vs 4 says "You are coming to Christ, who is the living Cornerstone of God’s temple". and as we are called to come to Him, so we are called to be like Him, "living stones that God is building into his spiritual temple" (1 peter 2 vs 5). we are called to share in the same nature and characteristics of our God - always faithful and loyal to the end (1 corinthians 13). that is something He is definitely teaching me at the moment.

look to the Rock. stand on the Rock. go to the Rock. run to the Rock. trust in the Rock. cling to the Rock. rest on the Rock. hide in the Rock. be like the Rock. and know that whatever is ahead, His ways are perfect and His invitation is into intimate safety in His name.

faith.

2009-07-22T23:44:00.002+01:00

there are only two things that amazed Jesus when He was on earth. one was faith. the other was unbelief. that should make the church today stand up and take notice. we can move God's heart to the extent that He, the Glorious Son of Man, is amazed by either our faith or unbelief.

"When Jesus heard this, he was AMAZED. Turning to those who were following Him, He said, “I tell you the truth, I haven’t seen faith like this in all Israel!"
(matthew 8 vs 10)

"And because of their unbelief, he couldn’t do any miracles among them except to place his hands on a few sick people and heal them. And he was AMAZED at their unbelief."
(mark 6 vs 5-6)

the faith of a believing, persevering heart that runs to Jesus knowing "that God exists and that He rewards those who sincerely seek Him" (hebrews 11 vs 6) awakens such a response from God that He not only responds to the desire behind the act of faith, but also publicly draws attention to it. i believe in this generation, "the eyes of the Lord search the whole earth in order to strengthen those whose hearts are fully committed to Him" (2 chronicles 16 vs 9). He's searching for a people of faith. a people who will stand firm on His promises and be unwavered in desperate, trusting prayer until those promises are fulfilled. a people who will reach with all their hearts to the hand of the King of heaven with the purpose of releasing His Kingdom will to be established "on earth as it is in heaven" (luke 11). a people who will not only stand and reach out in the place of prayer, but will stand on and for His word in the world, reaching out in radical acts of service, love, power and kindness with a deep confidence that the One who is with them and in them is for them and won't let them down (romans 8 vs 30-31).

just like light can't co-exist with hatred and darkness (1 john 2 vs 9) and love can't co-exist with fear (1 john 4 vs 18), so where there is persevering, child-like, tenacious faith, unbelief is defeated. its so easy to get gripped by unbelief in this age of fear, cynicalism and intellect. God's power, strength, righteousness and love go far beyond human logic. if He has promised He will fulfill. mary, Jesus' mother, is a beautiful example of child-like faith. she had to hold on with all her heart to some huge words from the lips of an angel through all the promises that were spoken over the birth of her Son, the One who came from above - "nothing is impossible for God" (luke 1 vs 37). and we have to hold on to those words as we fight for the fulfillment of God's promises to us (isaiah 62 vs 6-7).

the bible is full of courageous examples of faithfulness to and bold faith in God's word and sovereignty. like gideon and his 300 men who didn't defeat their enemies by the sword or the spear but by faith in the word from the Lord that the battle belonged to Him and He had given them the victory (judges 7 vs 15). or joshua stepped out in battle and into the land of promise in response to God's call to "be strong and very courageous" (joshua 1 vs 8-9). or peter who heard the call of Jesus to come out of the boat and walk on the water and obeyed with fearless confidence (matthew 14). and that story shows us so strongly that our faith depends so heavily not only on what foundation our feet are standing on, but to what or Whom our eyes are looking to. i know in my own walk with Jesus that taking my eyes of the Lord and His promises leads me into fear, battling with doubts and struggling against being overwhelmed by what looks possible. we need the trials of life to teach us to fight to set our gaze on Him. a faith that will endure is a faith that has been tested (james 3).

faith is rooted in hope. it "is the confidence that what we hope for will actually happen; it gives us assurance about things we cannot see" (hebrews 11 vs 1). and faith is born out of love - loving the Father so deeply and boldly that you'd do anything He says and anything that will glorify Him. and love is from God. so faith is a gift from God.

poor, naked, blind.

2009-06-30T13:49:00.008+01:00

our lives need to be governed by the words of Jesus and the perspective that He sees. so often our perspective on our own hearts, our own motives and our own desires comes not from what Jesus sees or what He says, but from our own understanding, driven by a culture of selfishness, pride and indifference. when Jesus' gaze becomes ours, when we truly wake up to the reality of our hearts from the heavenly perspective, when we set our sights on things above (colossians 3 vs 1-3), everything within us is brought into a different light.

this was the case with the words of Jesus to the 7 churches in the first 3 chapters of revelation. for those who were discouraged and downhearted, Jesus brought words of comfort and hope, revealing to them His joy at their perseverance and patient endurance through trials. for those who felt outwardly poor and at the end of themselves, Jesus affirmed them in their spiritual riches in His eyes and the strength they had access to because they had voluntarily chosen weakness for the sake of the Kingdom. and for those who were lukewarm and thought too highly of themselves, Jesus revealed His righteous frustration, His jealousy for their wholehearted love and His disciplining instruction to lead them back into fruitfulness through intimacy...

"You say, ‘I am rich. I have everything I want. I don’t need a thing!’ And you don’t realize that you are wretched and miserable and poor and blind and naked. So I advise you to buy gold from me—gold that has been purified by fire. Then you will be rich. Also buy white garments from me so you will not be shamed by your nakedness, and ointment for your eyes so you will be able to see. I correct and discipline everyone I love. So be diligent and turn from your indifference."

(revelation 3 vs 17-19)

the laodiciens had fallen into apathy. it seems like they thought they had it all together. but as Jesus looked upon the gathering of disciples in laodicea whom He loved so preciously and spilled His own lifeblood for on the altar of the cross, His heart broke and raged at the schemes of the world, the flesh and the devil to dampen the true, undying love that He deserves from His church. He called His followers to wake up to their true state in heavens eyes so that they may deal with their sinfulness in a way that would lead them back to love for Jesus and not more pride. we need that so often. we need to be awakened and convicted by the Holy Spirit of our real spiritual poverty before we can respond worshipfully by bringing ourselves before God and crying out for Him to heal and restore our love for Him. i love Jesus' grace in telling this church who have become apathetic and lukewarm towards Him what they need to do to be set on fire again. its so good of Him beyond what they deserve. He tells them to...

"buy gold from Me" ... the first thing Jesus commands these lukewarm lovers to do is to buy, by His grace not by any of our own merit, purified gold. john wesley said of this gold that it was "true, living faith, which is purified in the furnace of affliction". the laodiciens had substituted this authentic following of Jesus for a comfortable discipleship that wasn't rooted in deep, sustainable, tender devotion and affection. Jesus was calling His people back to true wisdom, not storing up earthly riches but living for a "rich relationship with God" (luke 12 vs 21)

"buy white garments from Me" ... Jesus wants a church dressed in royal white, not clothing themselves in their own self-righteousness and good deeds, but in His holiness, His goodness, His purity won for His people through His death. it is foolishness to stand before God showing off our own righteousness and wearing our morality like a garment because God sees and says we're as good as naked in His sight when we're in that state. true purity of heart and body is the overflow of coming to Christ and asking Him to clothe us in His own holiness.

"...and ointment for your eyes" ... perhaps the fundamental problem of the laodiciens was their blindness in God's eyes. what they saw as good works and blessing, God saw as lukewarmness and disobedience. they had put up the veil of the world in front of their spiritual eyes so they could no longer see Jesus in clarity and His call to love. i so desperately daily need a clear vision of Jesus, His word and His promise. it changes everything. and when our vision gets clouded by distraction and distress we can so easily find ourselves in the same place as the laodiceans, wrestling with apathy. a vision of Him and His grace is what fuels our love for Him.

"be dilligent" ... in their lukewarmness the laodicean church had obviously given up in working hard and dilligently to keep their fires ablaze and spread the gospel. Jesus rebukes and disciplines those He loves (verse 19) and part of that discipline is an encouragement to once again give the Kingdom our all. its so amazing that the first 3 calls of Jesus to the lukewarm church are gifts - only God's grace can enable us to obtain them as we come to Him and ask. but the last 2 require us to be active - to persevere and turn towards Him with our whole hearts. dilligence comes with a cost of energy, time and pride but comes with the reward of a heart on fire for the Son of Man.

"turn from indifference" ... indifference literally means "lack of distinction". for this church to turn from its indifference it would be turning from being one with the world and set apart from God's kingdom in its behaviour, to being one with the Father and set apart for God's Kingdom in its works. Jesus cries to hearts that have fallen away to turn from apathy and indifference and to turn to Him in repentance, letting go of all their demonic ideas of their own sufficiency and goodness and admitting total dependence on the greatness and grace of God as their only hope to be seen as pure in His eyes.

i'm so grateful that in His mercy Jesus has shown us the way of love for Him. i'm so grateful that ultimately all we need when we find ourselves feeling empty, lacking passion and zeal, spiritually dry and at the end of ourselves, all we need to do is come to Him. Jesus never healed anyone who didn't come to Him, or didn't have someone coming to Him on their behalf. the first step is simply to come, empty, tired, lukewarm, broken and say "Jesus, i'm poor, i'm naked, i'm blind. You alone can provide. You alone can clothe. You alone can give sight"

revive.

2009-06-12T01:15:00.002+01:00

something very special is stirring amongst the people of God in this land. the church is awakening from her slumber and arising to be the bride that shines with her Bridegrooms beauty and the army that marches to His beat with His authority. people are getting desperate for the Lord to move in salvation power. a small company of broken followers of Jesus who fail much but love much are beginning to see that He is the Only Hope for change. they stand forgiven, restored, redeemed yet wrestling at an empty wooden cross with love in their hearts and praise on their lips. a new hunger for His presence, His word, His Spirit is gripping the generation that won't settle for the pleasures of this world. they do not fear the taunts and jeers of the enemy. they hear the Master's call and the gladly follow and obey. even if it leads to their death - death to their flesh, death to their enemy, death to the world and death even to their own bodies. they will give it all. not living for fame or fortune, power or praise - they are living for the world to come, the applause of heaven and most of all the joy of their Father. they are living for His Kingdom come. if their God is for them, even in their weakness, failure and suffering, who can be against them? none.

Jesus stands at the door, knocking. His heart is broken over the evil that He sees. His eyes are tearful as He beholds the idolatry and adultery of the lost and worse, His own chosen people. but He has a plan. the Lion is on the move. the Lamb is on His throne. the Healer's hand is stretching out over broken hearts, broken dreams, broken lives and bringing Restoration. Living Water is waiting to be poured out onto barren lands that His plants may grow.

the ancient words are starting to come true before our very eyes. and we are left wondering, watching, waiting and standing upon the sweet and sure promises of God.

⁶ “In that coming day,” says the Lord, “I will gather together those who are lame, those who have been exiles, and those whom I have filled with grief. ⁷ Those who are weak will survive as a remnant; those who were exiles will become a strong nation. Then I, the Lord, will rule from Jerusalem as their king forever.” ⁸ As for you, Jerusalem, the citadel of God’s people, your royal might and power will come back to you again. The kingship will be restored to my precious Jerusalem. (micah 4)

over the next 3 weeks i probably won't be writing as regularly on this blog. i'm going to be blogging for a mission that's going on in one of the most spiritually, materially and emotionally deprived areas of europe - the rhondda valley in south wales. a team of 35 students will be ministering to a community, particularly to the kids and young people for 2 weeks in a place called cymmer. i am so excited. God is truly on the move proving true the statement that "The Light (Jesus) shines in the darkness, and the darkness can never extinguish it" (john 1 v 5). the student run ministry that's heading up the mission is REVIVE and i've been serving with some of the most passionate, amazing brothers and sister i've ever met over the last 9 months, leading worship in prayer meetings, praying with them, going up on a few different teams to the churches to run youth groups and building contacts with the churches. these next 2 weeks are going to be amazing, i am anticipating the Spirit moving in a huge way as we yield to His will and His purpose, surrendering all fears and yearning for His reign in our lives and in the broken lives around us. over the 2 weeks me and charlotte (my lovely lady) are going to be in charge of leading worship at the team daily prayer meetings and doing the daily blogs, updating everyone on how God has moved, spoken and acted in His grace in that day. i'm also going to be doing 2 talks - the first on 'humility' in the outreach week and the second on 'grace' in the discipleship week so please pray for that. pray that we who are serving would be a truely humble, loving and broken people. pray that we would be so after God's heart and desires that we ache with longing to see His rule established and His mercy poured out. and above all pray that God's Kingdom would truly come, that we would be protected and fall more in love with Him as we witness Him saving, healing, restoring, breaking, delivering, calling, filling, convicting, comforting and doing more than we could ask or imagine! to Him be all glory!

check out the blog everyday from saturday here .

found faithful.

2009-06-05T13:03:00.006+01:00

in these days where the much of the western church has become obsessed with its own celebrity culture there is a call from the heart of God and from His ancient scriptures that the Holy Spirit is awakening once again and that i want to respond to. He wants a faithful people. those who wont use what has been entrusted to them for their own gain. those who wont hide what He has gifted them with. those who will treasure Him and loving Him more than ministry, the stage, the praise and of man or the wealth of the nations. so many have fallen into the trap set by the enemy. so many give in to the desires of their old self - the flesh, rather than living in the Spirit. so many sell out to the temptations of the world, forsaking the One True Love for a momentary fix leading to instant pleasure and lasting guilt. still the cry goes out to those who will be faithful in love, courage, true humility and holiness until the end..."the eyes of the Lord search the whole earth in order to strengthen those whose hearts are fully committed to Him" (2 chronicles 16 vs 9).

Jesus promised that in the last days "the love of many will grow cold" (matthew 24 vs 12). the lust after fame, sex, riches and approval has already been a trap to so many. just last summer, within a few weeks there were stories of 2 men of God who had been massively used by God and had ministered to the body of Christ as a whole, who got caught up in the temptations of this world and lost the trust of so many, not least the Lord. it broke my heart, i can remember going to my room and just weeping, crying out to Jesus "when will a faithful church, faithful leaders, faithful lovers be found on the earth?". it awakened me to the urgency of faithfulness. faithfulness is a fruit of the Spirit and one of God's top priorities. it is a reflection of who He is - the faithful One who never abandons what He has promised to protect. it is an expression of our loyal love for Jesus, a statement of believing on Him and following Him despite trials and pain. i believe He is looking for a people who will be truly faithful to Him, over allegiance to the world, to ministry - even ministry He's called us into, and to our brothers and sisters.

faithfulness takes massive sacrifice. it nearly cost abraham the life of his son, the only hope he had of his destiny being fulfilled. just think about that. abraham was willing to sacrifice his God-given, God-promised destiny for the sake of being faithful. faithfulness cost joseph sexual pleasure when he chose to remain true to God over the lure of pharoh's wife. and faithfulness led joseph to jail. faithfulness cost daniel his position in the kings court, trading it for a pit full of lions. it nearly cost shadrach, meschach and abednego their lives as they chose the flaming furnace over the worship of idols that would jeopardize their loyalty to Yahweh.

and faithfulness cost Christ His own life. He and the apostles that followed Him, gave their very breath to be faithful to the Father and to live and die for His delight and approval alone. no temptation of the world could deter them from being found faithful to the King of heaven. faithfulness for Him must have consumed them, all their relationships, sermons, words, songs, prayers, mission trips, meals, rests - everything. everything was to the end of being found faithful to Him.

thinking about faithfulness recently has challenged the way i live my life massively. i've realized that so often i choose comfort and ease over true faithfulness to God and especially to people. i can too often be unwilling to go out of my way for the sake of truly serving others. i've been really challenged as well on the whole area of gifting. as someone who is up front with a guitar on stage often more often than i'm in the congregation, it can be easy to let true faithfulness be substituted by simply pleasing people. i read an amazing blog post by another worship leader called glenn packiam today which massively challenged me as a lead worshipper. although the principles largely apply to worship leaders, i believe they can be helpful for anyone involved in any type of ministry. have a read here.

lets strive to be a truly faithful people until He comes again and makes us perfect in faithfulness to Him just as He is and has always been to us.

after our hearts so they'll be after His.

2009-06-04T19:09:00.000+01:00

God is desperate for the love of His people. He doesn't need our love...He is All-Sufficient, being from the beginning the Three-In-One, Father, Son and Spirit, perfect in their heart for each other, perfect in unity of purpose, perfect in power, justice and love. God is Love. our God doesn't need what He is because He Is. He is satisfied in Himself, delighted in Himself, enough in Himself. but He wants us. He desperately, heart-breakingly, breathtakingly, lovingly wants our love. He longs and yearns for our hearts as a Lover for the heart of His beloved, or a Father for the affection of His dearly loved child. think on that for a few moments wherever you are today - whether in joy or misery, in holiness or failure, in love or in indifference - the LORD wants you. Jesus came from heaven to earth to win the hearts of wretched people and transform them into beautiful, glory reflecting sons and daughters.

i once heard that in the hebrew of psalm 23 vs 6 where it says "goodness and mercy will follow me all the days of my life", its original meaning captures an animal hunting its prey more than someone passively following a crowd. He is relentlessly after your heart like a fierce Lion after its prey. He wins us with His pursuing goodness and mercy because He wants us. He is so so jealous for the love and obedience of His people that He sacrificed heavens glory to win for Himself a bride that would be at His side for eternity.

the Lord has been teaching me about His desire for the love of His people through the book of exodus recently. through all the plagues that God sends on egypt (exodus 7-11), His purpose is consistent and clear... "let My people go, so they can worship Me". God perseveres like no other lover could, not settling for simply a portion of His people's worship, but desiring their all. pharaoh, the enemy of the people of God continually tried to force compromise on the israelites, wanting to with-hold the woman and children from going and sacrificing and even trying to not let the animals of the people go. but YAHWEH, the awesome, eternal God wouldn't give up in His mission of freeing His people so that they may love Him. He sent moses back to proclaim freedom time and time again so that God may have the entirety of His people before Him in the wilderness to teach them how to truly worship and love Him.

even when freedom comes to God's people through His miraculous deliverance at the red sea, God is still relentlessly after the affection and devotion of His people. after a brief interlude of the people celebrating the Lord's amazing hand at work in chapter 15 of exodus, the next place He finds them is in a state of complaining and worrying about His providence. in response, God does not give up on their fragile, changeable love. He provides and He tests them... "Then the Lord said to Moses, “Look, I’m going to rain down food from heaven for you. Each day the people can go out and pick up as much food as they need for that day. I will test them in this to see whether or not they will follow my instructions" (exodus 16 vs 4). God draws them close with His provision and tests the steadfastness of their hearts toward Him. it even goes on to say later that He promises to show His glory because of their complaints (exodus 16 vs 7), not only to prove Himself faithful to an unfaithful and faithless people but also to win their hearts. as His glory captivates them, He gains their obedience. through all the bondage, all the dryness and barreness, all the questions, all the testing and trials, all the sorrow and celebration - through it all, God is at work after their hearts.

God is after our hearts this day. He doesn't want our empty lip-service or religious acts. He wants our love. He wants our perseverence. He wants our hope. He wants our faith. He wants our every fear and every dream, our every tear and every joy. He wants our loyalty, our minds and our strength. and He wont give up until He forms a people who are after His heart. its one of the reasons He came, lived, died and rose.

"Christ loved the church. He gave up his life for her to make her holy and clean, washed by the cleansing of God’s word. He did this to present her to himself as a glorious church without a spot or wrinkle or any other blemish. Instead, she will be holy and without fault."
(ephesians 5 vs 25-27)

lets be a people after His heart in response. and lets have the same passion our Father in heaven has to win peoples hearts for the Kingdom.

*******

(after having interrupted the series of posts on the amazing words of Jesus from the beatitudes i've felt drawn away from continuing that series for now. i may continue it sometime later in year or i may leave it as a 4 post series - see where the Lord leads!)

narrow road.

2009-06-03T00:32:00.006+01:00

"narrow the road that leads to life and only a few find it"
(matthew 7 vs 14)

enoch.
job.
abraham.
isaac.
jacob.
joseph.
moses.
joshua.
caleb.
gideon.
boaz.
samuel.
david.
jonathan.
solomon.
elijah.
elisha.
josiah.
hezekiah.
jehosophat.
ezra.
nehemiah.
asaph.
isaiah.
jeremiah.
ezekiel.
daniel.
shadrach.
meschach.
abednego.
hosea.
jonah.
john the baptist.
peter.
andrew.
james.
philip.
john.
bartholomew.
matthew.
thomas.
james, son of alphaeus.
simon the zealot.
judas, son of james.
lazarus.
simon of cyrene.
stephen.
luke.
john mark.
timothy.
apollos.
paul.

each has their own story. i wish i could retell everyone. all of their stories are not of the courage, humility and gifts of these men, but of the strength, faithfulness and love of their God. He is the Story told by these names and billions of others. these men faithfully walked the narrow road of love and loyalty to the Holy One and failed often. but what marks them is the grace of the King they followed. their obedience was simply the response to the wonder of running into the safety and awe of His embrace. they believed on Him, loved Him, obeyed Him, spoke for Him, sang for Him, lost everything for Him, sacrificed for Him, walked with Him, wrestled with Him, trusted Him, clung to Him, wept with Him, . and now as a result of their faithfulness to Him and way more - His to them, they now see Him. all because they walked the narrow road that few find and but is the only way to true, everlasting joy.

in this world we will have trials of many kinds (john 16 vs 33). but we can take heart on the road when its hard to walk, hard to dance, hard even to stand. because our Saviour has overcome the road, and He is beckoning us to finish the race, stretching out His hand and offering us grace and mercy for our every need. He is the One who towers over every man on the list above. He is the Only One who truly knows what it means to walk that road.

Jesus.

we walk the narrow road, the way of sacrifice and surrender, the way of sharing His burdens and giving up the world for His sake and His glory. we do it because we know we will one day share in the lasting joy of being with Him, knowing Him and beholding Him forever. in that day the narrow road will be no more. so until that day, i want every choice i make, every song i sing, every word i say, everything i touch, taste, see, smell and hear to be dictated by the desire to follow my Jesus in the way of the narrow road. its where true joy is found. loving Him with all my heart, no matter the cost.

today is my 20th birthday and i pray this year that i would be among those names listed above, with countless others in heaven and on earth who were willing to do anything for the glory of the Lamb.

Narrow Road

I know the road is narrow
I know the path is hard
But I will choose to follow
Love You with all my heart

Your ways are faithful
Your word is true
Your heart is for us
Your plans are good

I know the way brings trial
I’ll be tested and tried
You make my feet surefooted
So that I may walk the heights

From the darkest night
To the brightest day
Jesus holds my life
Jesus has my days
From the faintest cry
To the highest praise
Jesus holds my life
Jesus has my days

"i made a vow"

2009-05-12T12:31:00.005+01:00

i'm briefly interrupting my series on the beatitudes to just share a short true story i heard from my dad a few days ago that brought tears to my eyes when i heard it. in the midst of blogging alot about how our hearts should be tender and pure and blameless before our Father, as the bride of His Son, i think its massively appropriate to take some time out (for my 50th blog post) to celebrate and stand in awe of the faithfulness and kindness of our God.

a pastor called rico tice was preaching at the funeral of a close friends wife in scotland. both this man and his wife were followers of Jesus, but the story of their marriage is absolutely heart-breaking. shortly after being married in their early twenties this mans wife became mentally ill. she was severely depressed, suicidal and totally unappreciative and unable to respond to the love of the husband. there were times throughout their long marriage where the husband literally had to rescue his wife from killing herself. rico tice hadn't fully comprehended the severity and extent of the marriage until the day of the funeral where some of these stories of her breakdown and depression were shared. decades of being married to a woman who was unable to love him, of living dayin - dayout with the looming possibility that she would kill herself, or him as well. sleepless nights filled with anxiety and pain, having to be on guard and ready to rescue at all times. in the end the man had to deal with the mourning and grief of knowing that his own beloved wife died by walking in to the sea of her own accord.

this mans devotion went beyond anything rico tice had ever seen. utterly perplexed and touched by it all, tice asked this man how he survived years and years of marriage with a suicidal wife. his reply is stunningly beautiful and yet shakes me to the core...

"i made a vow".

he was determined to stay faithful before God and before his wife. he was fearlessly devoted and wholeheartedly committed to the cause of loving her despite her constant need and despite what he may have been feeling. he was completely selfless and humble. he must have had to surrender and pour out every single dream of a 'happy' future together, of a stable life. he must've even had to have given up all of his ambitions, laying aside every hope of making a difference in the wider world just for the sake of giving his all to loving the one in need in front of him. he was the faithful loving the faithless. the whole loving the broken. the secure loving the suicidal. the persistent husband loving the perishing wife. what a picture of the love of God.

"And I will betroth you to Me forever. I will betroth you to Me in righteousness and in justice, in steadfast love and in mercy. I will betroth you to Me in faithfulness."
(hosea 2 vs 19-20)

He has made a vow to us. He wont leave us or forsake us. even when we commit adultary, or worship idols, or wander astray looking for satisfaction in the fading and fragile loves of this world, still He stands by us, faithfully beckoning us back. He is that devoted Husband. He is the Fiercly committed Lover that wont let go even when His bride is suicidal, depressed and unloving. He is UNFAILING LOVE. nothing can separate us from the covenant He has made with us in His own precious blood.

be assured of this today wandering, weary saint - your Husband has not forgotten about you. He loves you with an everlasting love. He is always faithful, always loving, always strong. and He has called you His bride forever.

beatitudes // part 4 : hunger + thirst

2009-05-11T14:05:00.001+01:00

to many of us in the west i think hunger and thirst are a bit foreign. what we want, we get. when we have a craving or a desire for food or drink, all we have to do is walk down the road, exchange some pennies for some culinary items and go our way feeling satisfied. we live in consumerism. the thing that breaks my heart most is that so often this "what we want we will get ourselves" attitude has crept into the church. Jesus calls people back to the Bread of Life, to the Fountain of Life - Himself. we shouldn't be hungering after success, thirsting after relationships or any other cheap replacement for the One we were made for. Jesus' call goes against the grain of the consumer driven culture. its not those who are full of worldly things that will be filled, its those who hunger after the reality of heaven, the Bread of Life, the One who is Righteous and Just.

"You're blessed when you've worked up a good appetite for God. He's food and drink in the best meal you'll ever eat." (matt 5 vs 6 MSG)

hunger and thirst after God. most other translations of this statement call people to hunger and thirst after righteousness. as we pursue God, we find ourselves longing for more of His righteousness to be at work in our lives and our situations. its those who run after intimacy and holiness as if they would be starved and die without it that will receive it in full. what an icredible promise and weighty challenge.

last week was probably the most intense week i've had since moving to cardiff. God's Spirit just seemed to fall with such favour and grace at every meeting i was leading worship at. at one prayer and worship meeting everyone just cried out for revival on their knees for an hour. at another we worshipped and prayed for each other from 10pm till 2am. at another we wept and cried out for the lost and for the waywardness of the church and our lives from midnight till 3am. i say none of this to boast, except in what God did through weak people who determined to hunger and thirst after more of Him. we were hungry for His righteousness to be manifest in our lives, for His righteous Kingdom to be established where it has been neglected, for His righteous beauty to be revealed and captivate lives. we were thirsty for His righteous presence, for His Holy Spirit that bears the fruit of righteousness in our lives. we let God be God in those places and watched and experienced Him move in power in our lives. we had a glimpse of what it looked like for "a desperate people to be plugged into a powerful God" (darren wilson)

it takes being hungry and thirsty to be filled with His fulness. we've got to ask the Holy Spirit to create in our hearts a yearning for Him. we've got to get closer to Him because the more we seek Him the more we find Him and the more we find Him the more we love Him and the more we love Him the more we'll seek Him. one thing that has massively helped me this year in cultivating a hunger for Him has been fasting - giving up dependence and allegiance to earthly things in order to posture our hearts to receive from the eternal One, the Only One who can satisfy the deep desires of our souls. later in the sermon on the mount Jesus didn't say "if you fast...". He said "when you fast..." (matthew 6 vs 16-18). as His lovers we need to make room in our lives to be utterly hungry and thirsty for more Him and His righteousness.

i'll finish with a quote from heidi baker, a missionary who with her husband has set up thousands of orphanages in one of the poorest countries in the world and seen revival as they've given up material hunger and thirst to thirst after the King of heaven and His food (His word) and drink (His presence). she heard Jesus say to her one day ...

"I died so that there would always be enough"

our Saviour has died so that there would always be food for the hungry and drink for the thirsty. He is the Bread of Life. He is the Living Water we need.

beatitudes // part 3 : earth inheritors

2009-05-03T21:58:00.004+01:00

"A little while, and the wicked will be no more; though you look for them, they will not be found. But the meek will inherit the land and enjoy great peace."
(psalm 37 vs 10-11)

the promise of the earth as an inheritance for the meek is one of the most counter-culture promises of the Kingdom. Jesus said "blessed are the meek (the gentle, the humble, the ones who don't push themselves forward)" at this point i'm sure the disciples could've thought 'that's nice, Jesus is blessing those quiet people who no one else really gives a second thought to'. and at this point Jesus stuns His listeners with a promised blessing of all that can be seen ... "for the meek will inherit the earth as their reward for loving me". in a world where possession of land is precious, contested and a sign of power, not many would think it was the meek who would be the heirs to it. powerful politicians, celebreties, arrogant dictators, surely? no. the earth will one day belong to the meek. in His eternal Kingdom, Jesus promises authority to those who will hold fast to Him through brokeness, hiddeness and servant-hearted obedience here. the promise in revelation 2 vs 26-28 baffles me with thanksgiving...

"To all who are victorious, who obey me to the very end, to them I will give authority over all the nations. They will rule the nations with an iron rod and smash them like clay pots. They will have the same authority I received from my Father, and I will also give them the morning star!"

what a promise. when (as the psalm above says), the evil are no more, God's children will reign with Him, worshipping Him and serving Him as priests forever. those who pursue and embrace meekness now will one day receive an incredible reward.

i honestly think meekness is one of the most stunningly beautiful characteristics that can be held by a son or daughter of God. it is such an expression of a deep, devoted and secure love for Jesus, love that "does not boast" (1 corinthians 13) in anything but the wonder of the cross (galations 6). meekness is a quite confidence in the power of God that walks in a peaceful joy, undisturbed by meager surroundings or humble, unseen service. as someone who is so often on the stage, meekness is such a precious and needed heart value to me. to be honest, i'm disgusted when meekness isn't reigning in my heart. it either leads to pride or feeling like a failure. neither glorifies God and neither embraces my true identity as a son of God, saved by grace through faith. meekness living to an audience of One, simply to please and delight in and glorify the Father in the light of His great love. not counting on other peoples opinions, but holding fast to the love of God. meekness is about who's opinion matters to you most.

and ultimately meekness is most manifest in the life of our Beautiful Saviour, Jesus. a guy called allen hood said "the strength of Christ's character is seen in His meekness...meekness is power under control, not to be confused with weakness. weakness is when you have no power and are forced to go low. meekness is when you have power and choose to go low."

in a generation that needs a restoration of that "strength of character", we need to look to our God of meekness to be our Example - the Highest choosing the lowest with joy.

beatitudes // part 2 : they will be comforted

2009-05-01T14:08:00.006+01:00

blessed are those who mourn, for they will be comforted.

as Jesus stood atop that Judean hill these words would have brought such relief and perhaps confusion to the hundreds who were waiting on His every word.

relief because israel were an oppressed people, a people wrestling with the roman empire to maintain their identity as God's chosen people, a people who knew much mourning as their land was seized, their city was occupied and their faith was mocked. it had seemed as if God had forsaken them and yet here they were in the midst of their suffering listening to the Son of Man promising redemption, rescue and relief in His comfort.

and confusion because here before them was standing One who they had thought was going to announce His reign as the powerful King of israel, triumphing over His enemies by sword and force. the prophet zechariah had told the people to "rejoice and shout in triumph" at the coming of their "Righteous and Victorious King" (zechariah 9 vs 9). yet the people had forgotten that the Messiah's victory would come through humility. His victory would come from His tender-hearted, selfless love for the widow, the orphan, the drug addict, the homeless man, the prostitute, the abandoned, the mourners.

here Jesus wasn't blessing the rich and victorious, the strong and the able. He was blessing those in grief. those so broken-hearted by their sin, by the tragedies caused by death and satan, by their desperate need for a Saviour, that it caused them to weep in weakness and lonliness day by day. however their blessing wouldn't come simply because of their grieved state. their blessing came in the fact that through their trial and anguish, they would know the comfort of the Living, Caring God of love.

can't you see the immense beauty of the words of Jesus? the people were crying out for a Deliverer. here before them stood a Man promising to be and send a Comforter. i'm going to look at 3 different parts of mourning that i believe God promises to comfort, to show the depth of the mercy and compassion of God in our sorrow and grief...

blessed are those who mourn over sin...

our grief comes through our sin. we lament over our waywardness from God, knowing that we don't deserve any blessing from the King of heaven. mourning over sin starts with being like david in saying that our rebellion haunts us day and night (psalm 51 vs 3). we recognise how much we break the heart of our Father in heaven and it causes us sorrow. but then there's the Comforter...

His comfort comes through the cross. isaiah 40 vs 1 says..."comfort, comfort my people,” says your God. speak tenderly to Jerusalem. tell her that her sad days are gone and her sins are pardoned". His cross speaks comfort to our sinful souls. His cross reminds us that He bore the wrath, He paid the price and now we are children of God. through the cross the Father speaks His words of comfort to His ransomed children, "do not be afraid, for I have ransomed you. I have called you by name; you are Mine." (isaiah 43 vs 1).

blessed are those who mourn over their longing for Jesus to return...

our grief also comes through our lovesickness for Jesus, our yearning for Him to come back to us, our desperate desire for deeper intimacy with Him. when asked why His disciples didn't fast while Jesus was on earth, Jesus replied “Do wedding guests mourn while celebrating with the Groom? Of course not. But someday the Groom will be taken away from them, and then they will fast." (matthew 9). He has returned to the Father, and though our primary response to that is to live in faith and joy, rejoicing in all He's done, all He will do and He's doing, we also need to have a sense of mourning in that His Kingdom has only come in part.

His comfort comes through the Holy Spirit and His promised return. His word, presence and intimacy with us now is the comfort and promise that one day we will see Him face to face and experience His glory in fulness. some of the last words Jesus said to His faithful followers before going to the cross were "now I am going away to the One who sent me, and not one of you is asking where I am going. Instead, you grieve because of what I’ve told you. But in fact, it is best for you that I go away, because if I don’t, the Comforter won’t come. If I do go away, then I will send Him to you". the Holy Spirit, the Comforter has been sent to us to fill us and lead us as we wait for Jesus. He is more than enough for us. He is the Lifter of our heads, the Hope for the hopeless right here and right now.

blessed are those who mourn over the sorrows of the world...

finally, our grief comes from the fact that we are strangers in this world (1 peter 2 vs 11). our citizenship is in heaven and so the imperfection and falleness of this world is amplified as we face trials of many kinds. it is right to weep over the suffering we and others go through, just as Jesus felt deep indignation and wept at the tomb of His beloved friend lazarus (john 11).

His comfort comes through the truth that He is the Healer. He can bring life and resurrection today, He has the power and He has put that power in us. paul prayed in ephesians 1 vs 18 that we would know that we have that power. just like He raised lazarus, so He can raise anything that has fallen under the curse of sin, the world and the devil.

but i believe His comfort to those mourning over the sorrows of earth comes mainly through the promise of a new heaven and new earth where every tear will be wiped away (revelation 21 vs 1-7 ... love this passage so much right now). His promise to make all things new brings comfort to those mothers who sit with a dead baby in their arms. His promise to make all things new brings comfort to those athletes broken and torn by the news that they are paralysed. His promise to make all things new brings comfort to church leaders who have been so hurt by their congregation that they feel suicidal.

for the oppressed, take heart, He has overcome and will make all things new.

for the downcast, take heart, He has overcome and will make all things new.

for the widows, take heart, He has overcome and will make all things new.

for the prodigals, take heart, He has overcome and will make all things new.

let that be comfort to all who mourn today.

my God has overcome and my God makes all things new.

beatitudes // part 1 : theirs is the Kingdom.

2009-04-28T01:09:00.003+01:00

for the past week i've put off starting this series on some of the most powerful and radical callings Jesus gave to those who would come after Him. He wanted His disciples to build (by His Spirit's help, His Fathers word and His love) a Kingdom and a church that would reflect His beauty, His selflessness and His glory. He calls us not to a life of fame and fortune but to a life of poverty, mourning, meekness, hunger and thirst, mercy, purity, peacemaking and persecution, all for the sake of gaining the priceless treasure of knowing Him and being found in Him, belonging to Him and worshipping Him (philippians 3 vs 7-10).

i think the reason i've put off starting this blogging series is because, in honesty, i've been so far from walking in these things this week. praise Jesus for the grace of our Heavenly Father, who picks us up and dusts us off when we fall into temptation and apathy in the pursuit of following Him wholeheartedly. this week i've been selfish, prideful, self-defeated, doubting, a fearful worrier, inconsistent and lazy. its in this place that i've seen my lack and seen the truth of God's "unlimited resources" (ephesians 3). it truly is all about Him. alongside the fears and failures of this week, i have known both the deep assurance of my Father's unconditional delight in me and have had a constant passion to be with Him, to cling to Him, to hide in Him and rejoice with Him because i know that He is all i'll ever need, all i truly want and all that is going to remain and stand when the rest of this world is shaken (hebrews 12 vs 27).

this tension, this wrestling, this deep knowledge that YAHWEH is God and King and i am not...this is poverty of spirit.

"blessed are the poor in spirit, for theirs is the Kingdom of heaven."

and its in this place of lack and dependence on His grace, His mercy, His compassion, His power, His love, His justice, His hand, His revival, His Kingdom, His dreams, His desires, His plans that i am ready to begin the series on the beattitudes. because the first thing Jesus said to the gathered crowd who were hungry for the knowledge of this One who had come with the power of God was "you're blessed when you're at the end of your rope...with less of you there is more of God and His rule". the place to start in this Kingdom, Jesus declared, is the end of ourselves. because when we're at the end of ourselves, humbled and broken, hungry and desperate...its then that we find ourselves thrown down on our knees before the feet of God, at the beginning of His unending ocean of love.

it wasn't to the pharisees, the religious people, the ones who had it all together that Jesus said "theirs in my Fathers Kingdom, His rule, His reign, His pleasure". it was with the poor in spirit. those who had emptied themselves, or been emptied, of all the longings and lusts of this world for the sake of giving their lives for a greater story of making Him increase and them decrease (john 3 vs 30). later on Jesus said that the Kingdom belongs to the childlike, those who have learnt to utterly depend on God as a child utterly depends on their father. if we want to be those who carry His presence, His kingdom reign in our lives and into the lives of other, we have to start by being poor in spirit - recognising our spiritual need to be empty of ourselves and full of Him.

the bible is full of promises to the poor. promises of protection, deliverence, provision. God's heart burns and yearns for the poor. He cannot help but be moved and delight in those who know their need of Him. psalm 22 vs 26 says "the poor will eat and be satisfied. all who seek the Lord will praise him. their hearts will rejoice with everlasting joy." psalm 113 vs 7 declares, "He lifts the poor from the dust and the needy from the garbage dump." and psalm 140 vs 12 proclaims "He will give justice to the poor". these promises reveal why God gives His Kingdom to the poor in spirit. He loves to use weak people because in their weakness His strength is made manifest and His power is glorified as the undeniable force of change. take any of the disciples as examples. men who were very prone to failure but who knew what it was to eventually empty themselves of spiritual pride and admit their need of the Holy Spirit. and they then carried the fire and the power of God. from orphans in need of a Father they became adopted heirs. poverty of spirit led them to a place of inheriting the Kingdom - seeing salvation, healing and the buidling of God's church on earth.

God gives His Kingdom - the vehicle of His rescue, His power, His revival - He gives this Kingdom to those who are needy and know it. i've marvelled at the words of Jesus from luke 12 before and in the light of the promise to the poor in spirit i think its right to marvel at them again ... "don't be afraid little flock, for it gives your Father great delight to give you His kingdom". if i was a king, looking to build a kingdom which is a "Kingdom of power" (1 corinthians 4 vs 20) then i probably wouldnt build it with sheep. here we have a Kingdom, built on the foundation of the Christ the Cornerstone (1 peter 2), the King of Kings and the Lord of lords (revelation 19) and from Him upwards, the rest of the Kingdom is made out of sheep. simple, lowly, dependent, wandering, poor sheep.

today, i pray that i would get down on my knees before my Father and once again simply say "i need You". it always starts in that place of prayer, crying out for more of Him. He said that without Him we can do nothing (john 15). we are simply branches, dependent on the life-giving flow of the Water (Holy Spirit) from the Vine (Jesus) and the provision of the Gardener (Father God). i pray that we as His people would see that we are only going to carry His power and life to the world and to each other if we first humble ourselve daily and admit its in Him that we are able to have faith, hope and love.

blessings from a King on a hill.

2009-04-20T09:39:00.001+01:00

over the next few weeks i'm going to do an 8 post series on what has been called "the constitution of the new covenant Kingdom" (R.A Campbell). at the beginning of His ministry, King Jesus climbed a mount and preached His dream of the Kingdom, calling disciples to a life of laid down obedience born out of captivating love for the the One who sent Him to that very hill, His Father. these are the words He said (in 2 different bible translations)...

"Blessed are the poor in spirit, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.

"Blessed are those who mourn, for they shall be comforted.

"Blessed are the meek, for they shall inherit the earth.

"Blessed are those who hunger and thirst for righteousness, for they shall be satisfied.

"Blessed are the merciful, for they shall receive mercy.

"Blessed are the pure in heart, for they shall see God.

"Blessed are the peacemakers, for they shall be called sons of God.

"Blessed are those who are persecuted for righteousness’ sake, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.

"Blessed are you when others revile you and persecute you and utter all kinds of evil against you falsely on my account. Rejoice and be glad, for your reward is great in heaven, for so they persecuted the prophets who were before you.

(matthew 5 vs 3-12 ESV)

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"You're blessed when you're at the end of your rope. With less of you there is more of God and his rule.

"You're blessed when you feel you've lost what is most dear to you. Only then can you be embraced by the One most dear to you.

"You're blessed when you're content with just who you are—no more, no less. That's the moment you find yourselves proud owners of everything that can't be bought.

"You're blessed when you've worked up a good appetite for God. He's food and drink in the best meal you'll ever eat.

"You're blessed when you care. At the moment of being 'care-full,' you find yourselves cared for.

⁸"You're blessed when you get your inside world—your mind and heart—put right. Then you can see God in the outside world.

"You're blessed when you can show people how to cooperate instead of compete or fight. That's when you discover who you really are, and your place in God's family.

"You're blessed when your commitment to God provokes persecution. The persecution drives you even deeper into God's kingdom.

"Not only that—count yourselves blessed every time people put you down or throw you out or speak lies about you to discredit me. What it means is that the truth is too close for comfort and they are uncomfortable. You can be glad when that happens—give a cheer, even!—for though they don't like it, I do! And all heaven applauds. And know that you are in good company. My prophets and witnesses have always gotten into this kind of trouble.

(matthew 5 vs 3-12 MSG)

the posts might be intermingled with other ones depending on how the Lord leads! i'm excited to search a bit more into what it means to be a blessed people.

He has broken down the wall.

2009-04-15T11:42:00.000+01:00

i love the end of ephesians 5 and the beginning of chapter 6, as paul instructs this young church on how it should handle its relationships within the church in the light of the rescue and redemption that has come to them and raised them to life with their new found Hope and Salvation, Jesus. this body of people was wrestling with who they were in their new identity as God's temple, His holy, adopted, ransomed people - living in the tension of being citizens of a Kingdom not of this world and yet being very much rooted in the reality of relationships here in this broken world. in every church community, this struggle is embraced.

paul spoke words of reconcilliation and redemption into the brokeness that exists between people, showing how Christ's sacrifice not only brings peace to our relationship with our Heavenly Father, but also "has broken down the wall of hostility" (ephesians 2 vs 14) that separates brother and sister in Him. in the light of being made alive with Jesus, paul, as one of my friends says, encourages these followers to shred their grave clothes and live as a resurrected people, taking off the old self and putting on the armour of God's new life. as we leave behind our sinful nature to run after the Spirit, God will transform and restore our everyday relationships with each other until they reflect God's heart for His community under His rule and reign.

verses 20-21 of chapter 5 are another way of wording the first commandment... "give thanks for everything to God the Father in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ...and further, submit to one another out of reverence for Christ."

paul goes on to instruct us how we are to live around each other, being the light of Christ in each others lives. submit as to the Lord. love as Christ loved the church. feed and care just as Christ cares. obey because you belong to the Lord. use discipline and instruction that come from Jesus. serve sincerely as you would serve Christ. work hard, as you would work for Christ.

every relationship is to be motivated and driven by our love for the Lord. when i think about the magnitude of submission, love, sacrifice, obedience, service, honour and instruction as if it were all being done for the sake of Christ and to the glory and reflection of Christ, my love for these words quickly becomes a love that is intertwined with a holy, weighty challenge. the Father is calling me to care for others in the same way as i care for His eternally worthy, all glorious Son.

the oil of intimacy.

2009-04-14T18:04:00.005+01:00

"One night as I lay in bed, I yearned for my lover.
I yearned for him, but he did not come.
So I said to myself, “I will get up and roam the city,
searching in all its streets and squares.
I will search for the one I love.”

So I searched everywhere but did not find him.
The watchmen stopped me as they made their rounds,
and I asked, “Have you seen the one I love?”

Then scarcely had I left them
when I found my love!
I caught and held him tightly,
then I brought him to my mother’s house,
into my mother’s bed, where I had been conceived.

Promise me, O women of Jerusalem,
by the gazelles and wild deer,
not to awaken love until the time is right."

(song of songs 3 vs 1-5)

-----------------------------------------------

i love the song of songs. in my childhood it was the one book of the bible i really didn't understand. but now, despite it still being quite a mystery, i can't get enough of it. i'm going to try and read it every day during 2009. it speaks of God's covenant love for His people, Christ's Bridegroom devotion to His bride, the church, bought with His blood and sealed with His Spirit. it tells the story of intimacy, knowing and experiencing God deeply as our Lover and Husband. may be a bit of an odd thought as first for macho-men christians. but its a powerful image of the level of passion and strength of desire God feels for His people. and marriage is an eternal symbol of the relationship between God and His created people - our waywardness, His pursuit of us, our adultary, His faithfulness, our engagement, His promised marriage.

intimacy with anyone is a precious gift. over the last few months many of you will know the Lord has blessed me with a beautiful, Christ-adoring girlfriend. its taught me so much about God's heart for relationship and His design of intimacy with us. intimacy with Him is what He's made us for. just like i share my hopes, dreams, fears, joys, failures with my girlfriend and closest friends, so God wants to share His life and ours (on a much deeper level) with Him. He created us to have a continual flow of love and trust between the throne of heaven and the hearts of earth. His question to adam in the garden "where are you?" after adam had sinned was a question of longing for intimacy with His creation. just like in the passage above, intimacy often manifests itself in lovesickness, a yearning to be near and embrace the One we love. to think that God feels that for us is mind-blowing! in hosea 11 vs 8, God says that we have aroused all His compassion and made His heart tear with longing for us. His yearning for us is expressed in His care, His faithfulness in our lives. it is all evidence of His desire to be intimate with us.

much of the church has neglected this one thing they were created for - intimacy with the Father - because religion teaches people to think that pursuing intimacy is a weak, flimsy pursuit, set aside for the contemplative and super emotional who have an unhealthy desire for feeling over truth. this is so, so far from the reality. if Jesus said He IS the Truth and intimacy is about knowing Him and sharing life with Him, then it can't be compromising the pursuit of truth for feelings because its very purpose is to know the Truth. it just doesn't idolise intellect in the process. the pursuit of a life of intimacy with God, walking closely with His heart and His desires and being a receiver and giver of His emotions is the most courageous life a person can choose. because Jesus said the road to life was narrow and only few find it. and because there is a war going on for our souls and for our worship, and our enemy doesn't want us to be overcomers, but rather wants the world to overcome us with its temptations and passing pleasures.

everything in our contemporary culture is geared towards taking our eyes off the eternal and promoting the elevation of self. this kills intimacy. intimacy with Jesus takes time. it takes sacrifice and repentance, hours spent locked away in the prayer closet. it takes purity. i love the story in matthew 25 of the 10 bridesmaids. read it. its such a powerful challenge to us to chase after the 'oil' of intimacy, rather than simply having the 'lamps' of outward ministry. we need individual oil to keep the lamps burning in the night of the end times so that when He comes we will be found awake and on fire for Him. but one of the interesting things about the story is that some translations call the bridesmaids 'virgins'. its so helpful in understanding intimacy to grasp the idea that intimacy requires that we keep ourselves pure, undefiled and set apart as holy for Jesus. we're not to give our intimacy to any other lover or give our affections to any other idol. its all to be kept for our wedding day with King Jesus. the Father is preparing a pure, not an adulterous bride, for His Son. Jesus said "blessed are the pure in heart for they are the ones who will see God" (matthew 5 vs 8). just like the woman who broke the alabaster jar over Jesus, we are to keep Him as the most precious Love of our life. that jar held both her inheritance and her chance of getting a husband. and she "wasted" it all on the Worthy One before her. all for intimacy.

one of the biggest challenges i've ever had given to me was in a worship time when i was quietly worshipping God on my knees, face down before Him. as i worshipped, i felt a hand on my shoulder and a voice in my ear, "owen, will you fight for intimacy? will you be the one who comes close and stays close? will you do this for your Lord?". those words shook me to the core. i need to hear them often and loud.

intimacy is a fight. it takes everything to give our all to God. but Jesus has gone before us and has torn down the curtain through His death that we may come into the most intimate place with God. His sacrifice is our invitation to a life of intimacy and His Spirit is our Helper in our journey of intimacy. its blessing is life abundant and eternal. Jesus has made us and redeemed us to know Him. lets pursue it!

God prevails.

2009-04-12T12:41:00.005+01:00

"Many are the plans in a man's heart,
but it is the LORD's purpose that prevails." (proverbs 19 vs 21)

the Sovereign Ruler of all never loses. whatever our circumstance today, whether persecuted or diseased or depressed or disappointed or opposed or despised, know this child of God - the LORD's purpose will prevail. His resurrection power cannot be defeated by any of the storms of this life. if nails and death couldn't hold the Son of Man, then no situation or plague can hold back the unstoppable force of His redeeming love from bringing new life to anything asleep or dead. i don't think i ever live in the fulness of the truth of His prevailing power. if i truly had the courage and faith that my God Was, Is and Will Forever Be Strength and Might then i would walk with more boldness, more humility and more passion.

Jesus right now sits at the right hand of The Majesty, our Father in heaven, enthroned above everything and He holds power and life in His hand. think about the weight and glory of that. and i, a son and an heir to His Kingdom can come fearlessly before Him and experience that same power. that blows my mind. and we, as God's army and bride, have access to the full resources of the storehouses of heaven. Jesus died and rose and ascended and sent the Comforter so that we may bring His resurrection power into fruition here on this broken earth as it is in heaven. heavens healing, heavens light, heavens hope beaming into the disappointments and broken dreams of people who had lost hope of a new life. but He makes all things new! hallelujah!

Jesus said "I AM Resurrection" (john 11). He doesn't just bring resurrection. He is Resurrection and where He is, where He reigns, there is life. where relationships, hopes, dreams and health have failed and come under the power of deaths curse, there is new hope in the wounds of a Man Alive.

resurrected relationships. resurrected dreams. resurrected bodies. resurrected hope.
resurrected people.

we don't need the grave clothes any more. we are a people fully alive in faith and hope and love in Jesus. God's purpose prevailed 2,000 years ago when by His mighty hand He rolled away a stone and beat the sting of death and sin. and God's purpose prevails in our lives as we trust His grace and power at work within us until the day when we will be raised with Him to life forever.

whatever the battle, God will prevail.

"Open up, ancient gates!
Open up, ancient doors,
and let the King of glory enter.
Who is the King of glory?
The Lord, strong and mighty;
the Lord, invincible in battle."
(psalm 24 vs 7-8)

7 heartbreakers.

2009-04-06T23:09:00.001+01:00

i've just listened to an absolutely amazing sermon by david perkins. he's the pastor of prayer at a church in colorado springs called new life church and heads up a student ministry called desperation. over the last year i've been so encouraged and fired up by this places worship, teaching and its heart for revival, mission and prayer. perkins was probably the first person who introduced me to the moravians and he's got a real passion to reach this generation with the message of wholeheartedness in an intentional pursuit of God.

the sermon is called "7 heartbreakers : knowing the strategies against a heart alive in God" and talks about attitudes and motives that will slowly over time destroy our undivided, passionate hunger and thirst for more of Jesus and His Kingdom and righteousness. its something i've been talking to some friends about alot

here are 7 of the enemies of burning hearts...weapons of the world, the flesh and the devil to kill our love for Jesus...

1. spiritual contentment
...if you're content with where you're are you'll never go further
...a heart after God is a heart that recklessly pursues, longs, aches, hungers and thirsts after more of God, "to have found God and still pursue Him is the souls paradox of love" (A.W Tozer)
...discontentment with how much revelation, fulness of the Holy Spirit and knowledge of God drives us deeper into yearning for Him
...the enemy wants to get us to the point where we think we're 'sorted' in our walk with Jesus
...one of the evidences that we've reached the place of spiritual contentment is becoming resistent of people who are spiritually 'intense'
...spiritual contentment will lead to a flirtation with sin
...the person who is spiritually hungry and thirsty's reward is a tender and hungry heart on a journey but they will be mocked and opposed by those who are too easily satisfied

2. casual repentance
...a person with a burning heart repents often because they understand the heart of God and His sorrow and hate of sin
...the way to keep our hearts tender before God is to become a man or woman of repentance
...hating sin can only come by facing the Holiness and Righteousness of God through repentance on a daily basis
...repentance will be uncomfortable but will make our hearts soft
...soft hearts, born out of continuous repentance, will make worship times an expression of whats already in our hearts rather than being distracted by music and lights
...we need God and His grace everyday, we know that His mercies are new every morning
...a right view of God will lead to a right view of ourselves, sinners in need of repentance, children accepted through amazing Love

3. apathetic friends
...winston churchill said "the best friends are the friends who bring out the best in me", get around friends who are going to spur you on in following Jesus, in purity, in passion, in love
...never underestimate the power of the influence of friends, we act like those we spend time with
...be wise and strong in how you choose your friendships, guard your heart against temptation and evil
...be extremely intentional in friendships - either you're missional (non-christian friends), you're ignitional (lukewarm christian friends) or you're teachable (friends more on fire than you)
...all friendships are about making disciples of Jesus Christ, there's no other central reason than love and discipleship, focussed friendships are the only friendships that will bear fruit
...you pursue a burning heart and you will naturally set others on fire, "set yourself on fire and the world will come and watch you burn" (john wesley)
...two burning hearts are stronger than one

4. excessive interests
...don't let worldly pleasures keep us from being in the word and in His presence
...loving Jesus takes time, energy and sacrifice, its a narrow way to invest in the word, community, caring for the poor, prayer, worship, fasting, preaching the gospel - - - love for things steals this time and energy
...busy-ness will steal your affection and rest in Jesus
...spending time with Jesus is the essential fuel in cultivating a heart alive, a burning heart
...alot of the interests we get involved in are not evil (though some of them are) but they can replace the Ultimate Good Thing
...king david said he was giving his life for "one thing" (psalm 27 vs 4), you cant keep your heart in so many things and expect it to be fully alive in its pursuit of God
...narrow your interests - Jesus is First (and Second and Third and Last), what God has called you to, who He has called you to love are next

5. cynical thinking
...Jesus loves faith, it amazes and captivates Him, whether from a child or a roman centurion
...cynical thinking is born out of arrogance and disappointments, thinking we know better than our Awesome God when the healing, the revival, the miracle doesn't come
...our faith needs to be radical and child-like, trusting God to do the impossible
...if we talk about Jesus' commands to the degree that we talk ourselves of obedience to them then we are becoming cynical
...Jesus told us to love - so love, Jesus told us to pray - so pray, Jesus told us to make disciples - so make disciples
...theology without obedience breeds cynicism, obedience with theology breeds a soft heart
...alot of people don't want to give it all, to believe the beattitudes, to pray, fast, give, serve, forgive because cynicism grips them

6. rusty evangelism
...the call to make disciples of all nations, baptising and teaching them with the presence of Christ till the end is the call to every follower of Christ
...paul (a guy that went through shipwreck, prison, persecution, violence, mocking and weakness) asked the church to pray that he would be bold - if he needed to pray for boldness, how much more ought we
...evangelism isn't an option, its part of our worship
...our lives, in real, face to face living - not just over the internet or with the 'professionals', needs to look like Jesus
...freely we've received, freely we must give, if we don't do this it will kill our hearts after the Father because giving makes us soft to Him and His voice
...evangelism teaches us to depend on Him, beyond results
...fires are designed to give off light and heat, you don't hide a fire away because that would go against their purpose, its the same with us

7. foolish dating
...date for pure, righteous reasons, not simply for the sake of dating
...a burning heart that sees another burning heart is so attractive, the way is so narrow and the people who have something to die for are irresistable
...marry God's best for you, don't settle for any less
...choose someone who is going to be a radical for Christ despite you
...know that you need to marry someone who is going to help you fulfill God's purpose for your life
...so important that both sides of a relationship are so on fire for God so that one doesn't hold the other back in their devotion to God
...see marriage as worship and as a mission

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we, God's bride, are in a battle. we can't afford to compromise. we can't worship both the world and our Saviour. the stakes are too high. we have to fight against all that distracts us and all the sin that so easily entangles us and run with passion and believing faith for the Prize of the knowledge of Christ.

palm sunday.

2009-04-03T02:00:00.000+01:00

the air is thick with expectation. people wait with eager hearts, ready to bring their offering, ready to lay down their lives. palm branches are flailing in the sunlight. songs of children and applause of praise are the only things drowning out the shouts of rocks, eager to worship the One who created them. they have anticipated and waited with patient longing for the arrival of One who would free them, One who would triumph over their enemies, One who would bring them close to the heart of their Awesome God. finally, as the crowd closes in on the road side and as all the world stops to behold this marvelous mystery, a donkey approaches. seated on him is the Carpenter from nazareth. the Teacher. the Healer. the Hope-Bringer. the Lover. the Temple-Clearer. the Storm-Stiller. the Resurrector. this is their God.

their King has come.

"fear not, daughter of zion; behold, your King is coming sitting on a donkeys colt!"
(zechariah 9 vs 9)

with this, what we call the triumphant entry or palm sunday, Jesus was stilling the fears and fulfilling the dreams of a people under oppression. they had seen Him raise lazurus and were now desperate to give thanks to Him for the display of compassionate power and courageous love. all they could do in response was explode with praise. the bible says that God inhabits the praises of His people (psalm 22). here we see Jesus ushered in by the worship and celebration of israel. here He is entering the Holy City, receiving heartfelt praise and adoration, humbly coming as a King on a donkey, glorified in His meekness, magnified in His humility. the pharisees stood defeated and speechless as He came. "look, the whole world has gone after Him!" they confessed, recognising His fame even in their hatred of this glorious Son of Man (john 12 vs 19). what a day this must have been for those who genuinely loved Jesus. the whole scene can be a picture of what happens as we gather for corporate worship, celebrating Him who came in the Name of Yahweh. we rejoice in His triumph and our rejoicing ushers in His presence among us. and He comes with righteousness and healing and grace and love and truth and hope and justice and mercy and song and strength and power.

but the whole story is also a massive challenge for us...it is proved that there were not many who genuinely loved Jesus that day. the very next week, the same crowd who worshipped Him with their lips, mocked Him with their lips. He entered that day not as a Triumphant King, but as a Crucified King. the crowd loved His power, but despised His suffering. how God longs for loyal hearts who will stand with Him, love Him, cling to Him, worship Him, serve Him in both His triumph and His suffering! mary and john were faithful and loyal to Jesus in both occassions. very few others, even those closest to Him, were.

"Look, the Lion of the tribe of Judah, has won the victory...then I saw a Lamb, looking as if it had been slain" (revelation 5 vs 5-6)

john was told by the angel to behold a Triumphant Lion. and when he looked, what did he see? a Slain Lamb. Jesus is both. are we willing to follow Him through triumph and suffering? on both the road of the triumphant entry and the road of calvary?

let this be a challenge to us this easter. are we welcoming in the presence of our King into our everyday lives, celebrating His victorious gospel? and are we standing with the same love in our hearts and praise on our lips for Him when the road gets tough and narrow and when our worship really matters in those dark times?

Father, teach us to be loyal to Your Son, the Triumphant Lion of the tribe of Praise AND the Lamb that was slain.

two words

2009-03-30T14:58:00.002+01:00

still your soul for long enough and you begin to hear the whisperings of heaven. when i'm at home i like to spend as much time as i can up a mountain, just praying and waiting on the Lord. a few days ago as i was just about to leave to go back home i felt really challenged to just wait and listen a little while longer than my natural instinct told me to. i really felt deep in my spirit two words that brought tears to my eyes. words that are ancient, words that hold so much depth and words that provide everything i need to hear and know.

I AM.

i felt my Father's affirmation, not in me and my efforts or my gifts or my heart, but in His own power and righteousness. "son, let these words rise and thunder in your soul today... I AM. I AM your healing, your strength, your victory. I AM your peace, your rest, your deliverance. I AM everything you long for, everything you need".

we need to hear those two precious words that millenia ago caused timid moses to have courage and boldness to give witness to his God infront of kings. those two precious words that when uttered by the mouth of Jesus caused His enemies to fall back on the ground in wonder and fear, as if they'd been hit by a tidal wave of truth.

“I Am He,” Jesus said. As Jesus said “I Am He,” they all drew back and fell to the ground! (john 18 vs 5-6)

whatever is going on in our hearts, lives and worlds today, know that He is YAHWEH. Strong, Kind, Loving, Wise. He hasn't changed. seek to know that He Is deep in your soul and find peace in that truth.

precepts + power + provision = promise + presence

2009-03-30T13:05:00.001+01:00

one of the most incredible themes of the bible is covenant. God's promise of love, protection and blessing to His people. under the new covenant, sealed with the blood of His precious, Risen Son, we have been rescued, redeemed and ransomed out of death and into life. His promise is over us and it will never fail. we are a promised people for the Promise Keeping God.

in the old testament, God's people were given a visible sign (just as we are in the bread and the wine of communion) of God's promise to be with them, for them, surrounding them, within them. it was called the ark of the covenant. the ark didnt just represent God's promise but also His manifest presence among His people. it was both incredible and mysterious, causing one man to drop dead and another to dance. that in itself tells us something about our God - His presence brings death and joy, terror and delight, reverence and rejoicing. but over the past few weeks there has been even more that God has taught me through this sacred box.

the ark contained 3 massively important artifacts that were to lead the people in worshipful remembrance of God's unfailing promise and goodness. the first was the tablets of stone that held the ten commandments, God's law, engraved by His own Almighty finger. this slabs of stone were to remind God's people of an essential part of their identity. they were to be motivated and driven by God's precepts. His laws were to be their delight and their obsession, and as they cared for the ark representing His presence they were to remember that where His presence and promise were, their His precepts were to be kept and cherished and obeyed. it rememinded His people that His standard was holy and perfect and if they were to be walking in the fulness of His promise and presence, they would need to (by His Spirit) keep His law.

the ark of the covenant also contained aaron's rod. this staff belonged to the first in the line of levitical priesthood that has been fulfilled in the new covenant by God setting us apart to be a "Kingdom of priests" (revelation 1 vs 5) in the order of Jesus Christ, our Great High Priest. this staff was to remind the people of the incredible might and wonder of God's power. it was his outstreched rod that summoned the plagues and the judgements in egypt. through God's anointing, aarons rod triumphed over the evil of the magicians of egypt, demonstrating God's supernatural strength and miraculous hand. as the children of israel carried around this rod it would stir confidence that the same God who defeated the magicians, who delivered them out of slavery and who triumphed over the enemies was promising His presence and protection as they went forth against their enemies.

the last item that filled the holy ark was the bread that God sent from heaven to feed His wilderness wanderers, manna. this bread was the lifeline to the grumbling people of God, showing Him to be faithful despite their faithlessness. which israelite could look upon the bread lying in the ark of God's promise without remembering the grace of God's provision? this food had been YAHWEH's selfless act of devotion and compassion to His people in some of their darkest days. it radiated His patience and heart for those who He had set apart for His own. it showed the amazing mercy of the Holy One who "led Israel along with ropes of kindness and love and lifted the yoke from his neck, stooping down to feed him" (hosea 11 vs 4). picture that. the Great King of heaven, I AM, the Ancient of Days whos name was too holy to even utter, bending down from His throne to give bread to ungrateful children. this bread would have called to mind this image of their King, bringing comfort in times of judgement and discipline, knowing how tender and steadfast His love for them was.

God's precepts, His power, His provision. these things represent His promise and His presence.

and for us, the new covenant bride of Christ, the Son of the Most High it is the same. His precepts, the law and fruits of the Spirit. His power, that power that conquered the grave that no longer is confined in a box but now lives in us. and His provision in His word, our daily heavenly bread. all these things seal the sureness of His promise and His manifest presence with us.

hallelujah.

He put a new song in my mouth.

2009-03-28T01:19:00.011Z

songs can express the deep longings of our souls towards God like nothing else. they can capture moments of revelation, moments of outpouring, moments of communion with our Creating and Saving God. since the beginning God's people and His angels have sung to Him.

songs of joy. songs of confession. songs of victory. s0ngs of rescue. songs of deliverance. songs of healing. songs of justice. songs of hope and praise and sorrow and yearning and surrender and faith and heaven and mercy and gospel and truth and Spirit and presence and need and emptiness and fullness. songs of love in every season.

songs of worship.

when Jesus taught His disciples to pray "let Your will be done on earth as it is in heaven" He was pointing them forward to the revelation john would receive on the island of patmos. a revelation of heaven, open and full of singing around the throne. worshipping God in song is part of the fulfillment to that prayer.

singing is massive in the bible, in the church, in heaven and in the individual life of devotion of every worshipper. God gives new songs for new seasons. in my life songs have been a gift from Him and to Him, crying out for Him, celebrating Him, thanking Him, adoring Him, cherishing Him, seeking Him, moving Him, trusting Him. they have documented my journey with the Lord and will continue to do so till He returns or i go to be with Him and join the heavenly chorus in their triumphant, glorious song to the Lamb.

i've managed to upload just a few of the songs that have helped me express my faith, hope and love for Jesus here.

1. my God makes all things new
2. cling to You
3. You lead me
4. abide with me (taken from a hymn written by a believer on his death bed, longing in his last moments for the intimacy of the Bridegroom who he will soon see in his heavenly home...amazing words, not mine!)
5. forgive us
6. Age to Age

they're mostly more prayerful and devotional in nature than congregational worship songs but they help me pursue Jesus and engage my affections with His Spirit. nearly all of them were written spontaneously in corporate worship times or in personal worship times which is why they're probably a bit sketchy! i hope they in some small way can be an offering to my Saviour who is worthy of "the faintest cry and the Highest praise" (as another of my songs says). and i hope in some small way the bless all who hear them, at the least to encourage people through a raw, real heart after God and His glory. hopefully i'll be putting others up soon.

desperate people.

2009-03-26T13:18:00.003Z

the history of the Kingdom and the church belongs to the desperate. the ones who gave everything for the cause of knowing Christ and making Him known. the ones who would abandon public fame in an instant for the sake of a moment in the sweet presence of their Saviour, hidden away in some secret place, on their knees weeping before Him. the ones who devoted long and lonely hours to prayer and bible study, reaching out to touch the fringes of the robe of the Healer so they could carry that same power to the broken, hurting, dying world around them. men and women who would cringe at the thought of their names being mentioned as examples, except that their boast may be that they followed Christ faithfully and fruitfully. followers who laid down their lives till the last breath to see the Father glorified through their good deeds.

i love that we as worshippers of Jesus in this generation have such a heritige of ordinary men and women who really gave their all to love God and love others. its humbling and challenging to think that these people who carried such special things to their generations were totally ordinary, apart from the Spirit that lived in them. it was only because of this Spirit within them, this Holy Presence, Holy Promise, Holy Power and Holy Provision that they were able to preach, sing, serve, give, love beyond themselves to the glory of God and the salvation of others.

and the Chief of them all is their Great High Priest, their Forerunner, their Co-Heir of the Kingdom, the First born from the dead, the One who made their Way to the Father possible and complete. Jesus Christ. and here comes the scary and awesome truth that follows on from the awe of Jesus and the way He has worked through His chosen people...

"The Spirit of God, who raised Jesus from the dead, lives in you"

wow. i've been singing a song alot lately that proclaims and summarises this glorious truth with faith stirring words..."the Same Power that conquered the grave lives in me, lives in me. Your love that rescued the world lives in me, lives in me". God has given us the Kingdom and all that is the rightful inheritance of His Son is ours too. what is our excuse for not being the passionate, desperate people that shaped history in this generation. we have all we need to live for God, to love God. He has given us Himself. not just on a roman cross but in a flame in our hearts, the Holy Spirit.

i'm living to see a generation desperate in their pursuit of their Holy, Loving and Powerful Creator King. i'm living to see a people rise up with passion in their hearts and praise on their lips, running after devotion when no one else sees. this is the desperate people God seeks after.

missional worship

2009-03-21T12:15:00.002Z

"love fulfills God's requirement"...

8Owe nothing to anyone—except for your obligation to love one another. If you love your neighbor, you will fulfill the requirements of God’s law. ⁹ These—and other such commandments—are summed up in this one commandment: “Love your neighbor as yourself.” For the commandments say, “You must not commit adultery. You must not murder. You must not steal. You must not covet." ¹⁰ Love does no wrong to others, so love fulfills the requirements of God’s law.

¹¹ This is all the more urgent, for you know how late it is; time is running out. Wake up, for our salvation is nearer now than when we first believed. ¹² The night is almost gone; the day of salvation will soon be here. So remove your dark deeds like dirty clothes, and put on the shining armor of right living. ¹³ Because we belong to the day, we must live decent lives for all to see. Don’t participate in the darkness of wild parties and drunkenness, or in sexual promiscuity and immoral living, or in quarreling and jealousy. ¹⁴ Instead, clothe yourself with the presence of the Lord Jesus Christ. And don’t let yourself think about ways to indulge your evil desires.

in Spirit and in truth.

2009-03-20T18:05:00.000Z

with the arrival of Jesus to earth came the arrival of God's Kingdom. and this Kingdom brought with it a new constitution for the way people are to worship their Creator. these are the words of Jesus from john 4 vs 23-24...

"But the time is coming—indeed it’s here now—when true worshipers will worship the Father in spirit and in truth. The Father is seeking those who will worship him that way. For God is Spirit, so those who worship him must worship in spirit and in truth.”

to put this eternal, powerful statement into context, Jesus has just stopped by a famous, ancient well while His disciples have gone ahead of Him to buy some food. Jesus is weary, tired from journeying around galilee and jerusalem, preaching about the Kingdom, healing the sick, raising the dead, commanding creation and loving the lost. He sits and waits. this moment has been marked out from the beginning of time by His Father.

then, as the sunlight beamed down on the dry judean earth, she came.

a broken-hearted, life-battered woman. divorced, more than once. confused about God's plan. unsure of the faith of her own people. but chosen from the foundation of the world to be a daughter of the King. and chosen, right here and now, to receive revelation from the lips of Emmanuel that would shake history, redefine worship and set many free with the truth that God was a pursuing Father.

"please give Me a drink". Jesus is thirsty for communion with her. He's breaking all the religious rules just being with her, let alone taking an interest in her hurt. as He loves her with love like she's never known from another man, she opens her heart to this One who told her everything she ever did (john 4 vs 39). she empties her curiosities and questions before Him.

"Sir, how must we worship God?" ... then came the response...

the time is coming, indeed its here now... God's Kingdom is both among us now and still to come. it is now and not yet. we see His rule and reign in our lives in part, in the church in part, in the world in part. but we always yearn and labour with Him for more of His Kingdom to break into our reality, crying out 'let Your Kingdom come'. there will be a day when we see His Kingdom coming down from heaven and when what we now see in part, we will see in full. His reign of righteousness, love and justice.

when true worshippers... worshippers with pure hearts, motives and actions, worshippers who recognise worship is relationship not religion, worshippers who give generously, who love lavishly and who serve surrendered. these worshippers live in the tension of the now and not yet, they walk with Jesus through this life striving to be controlled by His Spirit, failing much but confident that when they see Him they will be like Him because they will see Him with eyes unveiled.

will worship the Father... this new revelation of God's character must have shaken all the paradigms of God within the mind of this samaritan woman. with this new Kingdom comes a new intimate access to the person of God. "to all who believed Him and accepted Him, He gave the right to become children of God" (john 1 vs 12). no longer do the people of God just come in reverent submission, contrite confession and holy fear before their King. they can now come with joy and confidence, boldly approaching their Father who loves them. when the curtain was torn, our worship was forever changed.

in Spirit... this phrase from Jesus is a bit mysterious. what does it mean to worship in spirit? later in the book of revelation, john used this term to describe his posture of heart just before he received the revelation of Jesus..."It was the Lord’s Day, and I was worshiping in the Spirit" (revelation 1 vs 10). i think there's a number of aspects to what worshipping in the Spirit looks like. firstly, its about intimately communing with the Holy Spirit. He should be our ultimate Worship Leader in that Jesus said that one of His primary roles is to unveil the glory of Jesus to people (john 16 vs 14). so we should seek to see what He is revealing of Jesus and respond to that. worship in spirit involves doing those acts which please God with the right attitude. secondly, i think worship in the Spirit is about engaging with God, His truth and His presence on a deep level. not just singing songs and being physically present, but actually touching His reality, His Spirit from the depths of our beings. its about passion and humility. thirdly, i think worship in the Spirit is about supernatural encounter, being caught up in the Spirit realm as we worship the Father, just as john was on the Lord's day.

in truth... all of our affections need to be rooted in bible and grounded in a true understanding of who God is, whats on His heart and what He's done. worship in truth is about loving God with our minds, using our intellect to glorify Him. thats what i've always thought, and that is right, but recently i've discovered worship in truth is about much much more. its about truly worshipping. integrity. honesty. worship that marries our understanding of God's reality with our everyday actions. serving people, loving people, acting justly, loving mercy, walking humbly. proclaiming the gospel is worshipping in truth. its worshipping with no falsehood, all of our motives and intentions being in line with His.

the Father is seeking those who will worship Him that way... this is such an important reality to wake up to if we're going to truly worship in Spirit and truth. the Father delights in worship. He longs for worshippers. He finds pleasure in seeking out and finding people after His own heart..."The eyes of the Lord search the whole earth in order to strengthen those whose hearts are fully committed to Him" (2 chronicles 16 vs 9). psalm 23 talks about how goodness and mercy follow us all the days of our lives. the hebrew word for follow is actually linked to an animal hunting and pursuing its prey. thats how the Father seeks us with His goodness and mercy. He is jealous for His glory, always wanting those who will truly love Him in Spirit and truth.

for God is Spirit... God is everywhere, all present, all powerful, ever moving. He is like the wind, like fire, like breath. He soars and burns and breathes. He is totally other, totally different to anything we will ever know or experience. and this is the over-riding motivation for our worship. God is God. He can touch the depths of us like no one else. He has set eternity in our hearts. He has created us for continuous, intimate, life-changing fellowship with Him. He speaks and heals and moves and creates and re-creates. He is exciting and mysterious. but He is also faithful and sure. God is Spirit, and so...

...those who worship Him must worship in Spirit and in truth.

let us be those people.

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as you may have noticed, i've updated the look of the blog. all the posts are going to be the same thematically, despite the name change and layout change. in the light of writing this post, just thought 'Spirit and truth' was a less vague title for the blog :). enjoy, blessings x

i love the King and the King loves me.

2009-03-17T00:14:00.008Z

this last weekend was probably my favourite few days of 2009 so far. i spent it leading worship at a student weekend away with 80 passionate Christ followers from st aldates in oxford, a church very close to my heart after i spent a year as a worship intern there last year. it was such an honour and privilege getting to worship our Father in heaven with them, and it was a really refreshing time for me, reminding me of what an amazing, undeserved grace it is that i get to help lead people in worship as a ministry. i am so thankful. the whole weekend people were just so eager to worship and lay down their lives and give God glory with abandon. i felt so released to follow the Spirit's leading and sang out spontaneously all that i felt was on heavens heart. the worship times were special times and i pray that the fragrance that rose from our hungry, desperate, humble hearts in that place will now spill out into the lives and actions of those students and of me as we seek first His Kingdom in all we do.

one of my favourite times of worship from the weekend (even though i loved them all) was the last session on sunday morning. we had some words from the Lord through people during the worship about God's faithfulness and His commitment to us. as we celebrated that truth in spontaneous song that lasted some time and just poured out ourselves at His feet, i heard a bubbling in the congregation. it started with one girl and spread like wildfire until as one we were all singing the beautiful new refrain "i love the King and the King loves me". that truth hit home again. it needs to hit home in my life every day. that childlike clinging to the simple majesty of the gospel needs to be ever on my lips. that revelation of love. its always all about love. love is at the heart of what our worship was all about that day. love from Him, love for Him. thats what it should ever be centered on.

be loved by God. love God. love others.

love is truly beautiful. to see someone cry, laugh, dance, sing, give, live, die all because of love brings delight like nothing else. selfless love changed the course of history the day Jesus made the choice to become poor for the sake of loving His Father and loving us. and selfless love has the power to change lives now as we make the choice to put God first in our affections and take time to actively love others. to awaken in friends, in enemies, in brothers and sisters, in parents and teachers, in priests and paupers, in thieves and athiests the reality of the Fathers softening love for them. what a precious jewell we hold in our hands as the children of God. we, i, barely, if ever, recognise the full weight and power of what God has put in our hands. to love. the possibility of love.

"if we love each other, God lives in us, and His love is brought to full expression in us" (1 john 4 vs 12)

i want to bring His love into "full expression" through my care for others. and i want first God's love for me and mine for Him to be the reality that drives me into that expression of care for others. that i may not only sing "i love the King and the King loves me" but that i may also sing "i love the world and the world loves Him"

Kingdom unshakeable

2009-03-17T00:10:00.000Z

the bible talks again and again about how we, as God's children, are inheriting a Kingdom that cannot be spoiled, that is beyond the reach of decay and perishing, that is pure and undefiled, that cannot be shaken and cannot be destroyed. lets rejoice in that today. His Kingdom is unmoved by the chaos of this life. His Kingdom will know no end, from now until the time it is established in its fulness when Jesus returns. hallelujah, what a Kingdom. what a promise.

when clouds veil Son

2009-03-16T00:45:00.005Z

seeing isn't believing. seeing is for believing. to believe without seeing is to be blessed.

there have been moments in my life, and in the lives of God's people, when a vision of God and the revelation of who He is and all He's done has been overwhelming. in those moments our gaze is captured, we become utterly transfixed with the Majesty of the One who stands before us. with the eyes of our heart, we see. God by His Spirit often brings us to this place in the midst of our own poverty, desperation and need. for isaiah it was "in the year the king uzziah died" (isaiah 6), a time of political turmoil and change, a time when israel had lost their leader, their king. it was in this context that YAHWEH, the True King of israel, the Ruler of the ends of the earth, revealed Himself in stunning might, pride-shattering glory and faith-stirring splendour. for daniel it was after he had been "in mourning for 3 weeks" (daniel 10), a time of intense grief, repentance and searching, a time where he had fasted and laid himself out empty and yielded before the Lord. it was in this context that the Eternal Jesus encountered this faithful servant, this man called "highly esteemed" by the Father, and revealed the beauty of His face, His image, His worth. Jesus opened daniels eyes to His glory and daniels only response was to fall at His feet before Him as though daniel had died. for john it was while he was "in prison on the island of patmos" (revelation 1), a time of persecution and trial, of hardship and perhaps even questioning. in these moments of need, God comes and brings a revelation of who He is in His Son as john, the beloved disciple, humbly worships.

these moments of glorious epiphany are so special, so cherished, so needed by me and the church in this generation. a glimpse of the glory of the Holy One changes everything. but these moments come for a reason. they come for the moments when we dont see in full clarity, full uncontrolable wonder. for isaiah, his vision sent him out to be a prophet with a pure, passionate heart and a definite, dangerous message. for daniel, his glimpse of God was for the sake of his receiving of an understanding of the things that were to come. and for john, his revelation was for the encouragement of the church down the ages. just as God counselled joseph to store up 7 years of abundance for the sake of provision for survival in the 7 years of drought, so in our lives the times spent in His manifest presence are for the purpose of equipping us to live in faith, hope and love when the clouds veil the Son. so often i fail to hold on to what i have seen when i have been with Him, when all around me closes in. so often, i feel like thomas...

²⁴ One of the twelve disciples, Thomas (nicknamed the Twin), was not with the others when Jesus came. ²⁵ They told him, “We have seen the Lord!”

But he replied, “I won’t believe it unless I see the nail wounds in his hands, put my fingers into them, and place my hand into the wound in his side.”

²⁶ Eight days later the disciples were together again, and this time Thomas was with them. The doors were locked; but suddenly, as before, Jesus was standing among them. “Peace be with you,” he said. ²⁷ Then he said to Thomas, “Put your finger here, and look at my hands. Put your hand into the wound in my side. Don’t be faithless any longer. Believe!”

²⁸ “My Lord and my God!” Thomas exclaimed.

²⁹ Then Jesus told him, “You believe because you have seen me. Blessed are those who believe without seeing me.”

(john 20)

thomas had seen enough of Jesus' character and love to have held on to Him through all things. He had heard, just days before of the great plan of the Father, the great suffering of the Son and the great promise of the Spirit. and yet somehow, in the midst of pressure and a crushing sense of confusion and loss, thomas was filled with fear and stubborn faithlessness. too many times, when my mind is full of other things, when my heart cant engage fully with the reality of Christ, i, like thomas can be subject to deserting passionate devotion for the Son of Man.

but once again, because of His grace, Jesus meets His dear disciple in this place. He reveals Himself. what a Faithful God. even in thomas' stubborn doubt and disobedience, Jesus reveals not only His power to thomas, proving the resurrection, but also unveils His infinite mercy, new every day, for those who He has called His own. this is so comforting for those of us who find it hard to keep the same level of abandon and faith going when we have scales on our eyes. there is mercy. there is hope. there is restoration. all because Jesus can show us His wounds, and invite us to go beyond simple understanding into touching those very wounds, being overwhelmed by the reality of the God-Man before us.

but Jesus says that the blessing isn't in the believing once we've seen and touched. the blessing is in the believing despite whether we have seen or not. for those who can't see God at work, whose feeling and thoughts mount up in battle against them, telling them to give up and discouraging them - Jesus says they are blessed. its in this place that we learn to walk by faith and not by sight. this is where true, persevering, loyal faith is formed. when we can't see ahead of us, can't see God's purposes, even find it hard to see God's promises - and yet still choose to believe that our God reigns and our God is for us. choosing to praise as job, jonah, joseph, david and paul did in the midst of being starved of new revelation of God and in the midst of being under the pressures of this life - thats what true faith is.

all God has given us already is enough. there is always enough. the hungry always get fed. His timing may be mysterious, but it is always perfect. choose to believe. choose to hope. choose to see when we cannot see.

"when darkness seems to veil His face
i'll rest on His unchanging grace"

consider it pure joy

2009-03-12T01:05:00.002Z

every whole-hearted follower of Jesus walks a narrow road. with the Lamb ahead of them as their Guide and their Example (hebrews 12 vs 2 ... who "for the joy set before Him" endured the narrow road of the cross) they tread the path of suffering and sacrifice, depending on Him for every breath and every fresh moment of hope. they depend on Him for sustenance, for love and for wisdom and guidance. they depend on His word to lead them to green pastures, even in the midst of the dry desert (john 10 vs 9). its His voice that sustains them through the darkest night, through the fiercest fire, through the longest drought, the deepest valley and the terrifying storms. its His rod and staff that bring comfort, healing and discipline into those times when the road is simply too narrow to walk in human strength. the narrow road is all about Him. because without Him they - we - cant survive the narrow road.

there will be times when our Master will lead us to empty tombs. He'll lead us along His road to power and victory and resurrection and revival. He'll take us by the hand and show us the dead come to life, He'll show us the throne room of heaven, the angels who adore Him, the glory of the earth that reflects Him. but there will be times, if we follow Him with pure hearts and abandoned surrender, when He leads us on the path all too familiar to Him. the path of calvary. the road of death, torment, suffering. He called His followers to take up their cross and follow Him, to share in the fellowship of His sufferings - not simply to spectate and applaud or even to watch and be moved to tears by His act of selfless love. but to see His loyalty to His Father's mysterious, beautiful plan and to run in His direction. dying to ourselves is painful enough. but then suffering for His sake is surely unbareable.

trials. temptations. tests. tears. tribulation.

but in the midst of this sorrowful perspective on discipleship, God through His word gives His disciples some beautiful gifts to not only sustain them in their hour of need, but to make them more than conquerors. He gives perfect peace (john 16 vs 33), He gives grace (2 corinthians 12 vs 9-11), He gives endurance (hebrews 10 vs 36) and He gives joy.

joy.

what an incredible gift to give to the church when she is faced with trials on every side (2 corinthians 4). the Lord's joy is our strength (nehemiah 8 vs 10). joy overflows in rejoicing and spills into the lives and experience of those around us. but the gift of joy isn't just a separate entity bestowed on the child of God during the time of trial. the trial is the very reason for the joy, according to james...

"consider it pure joy...count it all joy...when you face trials of every kind" (james 1 vs 2)

notice that the emphasis is not on the trial but on the joy. i too often magnify the trial, God wants me to magnify Him, my Joy in the midst of the trial. pure joy. unadulterated joy. joy with no conditions. joy despite circumstance. joy that sings and dances and loves and laughs and prays and gives and lives full and free even when in the face of utter terror. joy unshakeable, joy that stands firm and endures misery, failure, doubt and world-shattering troubles, and endures with worship. joy that rejoices because of the endurance and backbone that is being formed..."we can rejoice, too, when we run into problems and trials, for we know that they help us develop endurance" (romans 5 vs 3).

this is joy like i have not known. joy that i need every day. joy that makes carrying my cross not only bareable, but makes it a delight because i am so fixed in my identity in my Heavenly Father that truly, nothing matters except that i belong to Him. i need to go to Him, the Source of all Joy (psalm 43 vs 3) everyday and drink from the well of His joy. only then will i find the supernatural grace to walk the narrow road, following my Saviour through think and thin, better or worse, in sickness or in health, for richer or poorer.

"restore to me the joy of my salvation" (psalm 51) ... Father, fill me with Your joy. boundless, heavenly, You-centred delight. for Your glory and for my perseverance.

a servant of The Servant

2009-03-01T19:18:00.010Z

its been a long, long time since i last properly blogged. i'm sorry that february's blog posting virtually fell apart, mainly to God more than anything. i had desired to set aside february as a month for the pursuit of the knowledge of Him, being like mary in sitting at His feet in child-like wonder (luke 10 vs 38-42), listening to the words of eternal life from the glorious Son of Man (john 6 vs 68) and rising in holy obedience that can only come from abiding in Jesus (john 15 vs 4). i wanted to be captivated again by simply who He is and be a sold out, radical follower and tender-hearted lover of the King of kings that was secure and confident in His truth.

the month of february turned out to be probably one of the busiest 4 weeks of my life! i've worked out that from the 30th january-28th february i led worship about 25 times...at prayer meetings, student weekends away, church services, conferences, late night prayer and worship times, student meetings, Christian union, even out on the streets of cardiff! i don't boast in that, nor do i suggest it was a burden because worshipping Jesus is a joy and being able to lead others in praise of Him is one of the biggest privileges i believe anyone can ever have. but it was draining! emotionally, spiritually and physically the demands of the months leading, coupled with studying, serving in other ways, travelling afar for different conferences and training days and striving to love others more...it all made for an intense month! but God has been so faithful. despite the fact that being caught up in a bit of a whirlwind of busy-ness has felt like this month has had the opposite impact on my heart and mind than i was yearning for, im sure He has taught me so much. here are seven lessons i'm still learning that the Holy Spirit has been using to fan the cold embers of my dry and weary soul this last month...(they probably would've been whole blog entries if i had had time along the way! but i'll just do mini versions of each to make an epically long comeback post)

1) the Servant King... Jesus Christ knows what it is to feel drained and yet still be pouring out into peoples lives. the writer of hebrews talks about how He can sympathize with our every weakness and trial because He has been through it all. and its a massive comfort to know that He knows what it is to be a Servant, and in the light of His Servant-Heart and the way He gave freely of Himself for everyone, my complaining about feeling drained seems a bit pathetic! He constantly withdrew from the crowds to seek His Father, even in the middle of the night, and was always found in the place of prayer because He knew thats where true power from on high came from. yet even when His quiet times were disrupted by the crowds need at the beginning of matthew 14, in a time of what must have been intense spiritual and emotional battle after hearing of the death of His cousin john, Jesus gave and gave and gave. He wants His followers to have the same attitude as Him (philippians 2 vs 5). to serve and empty ourselves for others so we can be filled by His Fathers grace. His followers are to follow in His Servant footsteps, as paul said "pouring out our lives like a drink offering" (philippians 2 vs 17).

2) 7 years of plenty, 7 years of drought... that leads nicely on to another lesson i've been learning the past few weeks. in times when we feel empty, like we're in the midst of a spiritual drought, God's word and past faithfulness to His people are so encouraging. in genesis 41, joseph, a broken, trusting and humble servant of God comes before pharoh and uncovers God's prophetic voice speaking to the ruler. there will be 7 years of great abundance in order to provide for 7 years of drought. the Lord always allows enough for His people. alot of the time, way more than enough. but sometimes He gives us what we need to survive so that our dependence on Him will be tested and grow. i think we've got to adopt this principle to our devotional lives. in the times when we feel like theres almost an open heaven over us, revelation from His word is effortlessly flowing, His presence feels tanglibly near and moving and our prayer times feel full of fire, we've got to store up all that revelation and experience for the times where God leads us into a bit of a wilderness to purify our hearts and mould our characters. theres a great quote i heard from some guy called dr v raymond edman, "never doubt in darkness what God has shown you in the Light". what God has given us in the times of plenty we have to store up and use to give us courage, perseverence and strength in the times of drought.

3) it is finished... in worship times i've started re-using a chorus refrain from the first worship song i wrote, called 'nailed to a tree' all about the cross of Christ. God has been drawing me back to that reality of His selfless love once again and reminding me of the sheer, uncontainable glory that is the truth that "IT IS FINISHED". i did a bible study on the cross with some non-christians last week and it was amazing seeing them get it, maybe for the first time. Christ has died, and so through faith i am reconciled with God. nothing can compare with that gospel truth and i need to anchor my life on it so much more if i want to be a bold, passionate, faithful witness to Jesus.

4) the God who carries... God's grace is more amazing than we'll ever know. He loves me so much, more than i know or believe. and His grace is shown not only in the cross and all He has done for us there, but in all He continues to do for us that we so dont deserve. our God rebuilds, revives, restores, rescues. our God gives generously, welcomes willingly and holds faithfully. and our God is a God who serves and carries us. this quote says it all... "The difference between the true God and the gods of the nations is that the true God carries and the other gods must be carried. God serves, they must be served. God glorifies His might by showing mercy. They glorify theirs by gathering slaves." john piper

5) the 10 bridesmaids... i'm hopefully going to expand on this one in a future post. matthew 25 has an amazing parable about the end times and how 5 bridesmaids (or virgins) were wise by taking the oil of intimacy with them and 5 were foolish by not taking intimacy with them as they waited for the return of the Bridegroom. we need to not just focus on our ministries (our lamps, how we shine out Christ to the world), but we need to primarily focus on intimacy with Him because it is that that will give us enough oil to wait for His return and light our lamps to go out and meet Him. this all seems quite complex in a few sentances so hopefully i'll explore it some more some other time!

6) loving others... i've been drawn back in the last few weeks to one of my favourite books in the bible, written by one of my favourite people in the bible, 1 john. there are 2 stunning statement in chapter 3 which sum up how the church is live in relation to each other..."this is the message you heard from the beginning: we should love one another...this is how we know what love is: Jesus Christ laid down his life for us" (1 john 3 vs 11, 16). i've been excited about what that can look like but also challenged by how far i am from it, especially when i get busy and cant concentrate on how to best care for those around me. Jesus is so desperate for us to just learn how to love, in response to His unfailing love.

7) i am nothing without Him... humility is a lesson i'll never stop learning, by God's grace. living as a disciple of Jesus means embracing being 'poor in spirit', recognising we truly are nothing without God's help. all our love, gifts, wisdom and knowledge come from Him. His is the Sovereign decision to take someone weak and use them for His glory. ours is the humble obedience to simply seek Him and say "however, whenever, with whoever, doing whatever...i want to prove my love in service to You". but all of that starts at His feet. the last month has reminded me that you can never replace the Good One with good things. Jesus longs for a bride thats not too busy to sacrifice time, sleep, activity, ministry and the stage to be with Him in the secret place.

Lover of my soul

2009-02-23T00:04:00.002Z

charles wesley responding to the beauty of the Refuge of Christ in the midst of dark days of persecution and suffering for the proclamation of the gospel of the Kingdom...

Jesus, lover of my soul, let me to Thy bosom fly,
While the nearer waters roll, while the tempest still is high.
Hide me, O my Savior, hide, till the storm of life is past;
Safe into the haven guide; O receive my soul at last.

Other refuge have I none, hangs my helpless soul on Thee;
Leave, ah! leave me not alone, still support and comfort me.
All my trust on Thee is stayed, all my help from Thee I bring;
Cover my defenseless head with the shadow of Thy wing.

Wilt Thou not regard my call? Wilt Thou not accept my prayer?
Lo! I sink, I faint, I fall—Lo! on Thee I cast my care;
Reach me out Thy gracious hand! While I of Thy strength receive,
Hoping against hope I stand, dying, and behold, I live.

Thou, O Christ, art all I want, more than all in Thee I find;
Raise the fallen, cheer the faint, heal the sick, and lead the blind.
Just and holy is Thy Name, I am all unrighteousness;
False and full of sin I am; Thou art full of truth and grace.

Plenteous grace with Thee is found, grace to cover all my sin;
Let the healing streams abound; make and keep me pure within.
Thou of life the fountain art, freely let me take of Thee;
Spring Thou up within my heart; rise to all eternity.

Spirit.

2009-02-03T12:04:00.007Z

the Holy Spirit is our Victory.

we'll never be able to fully comprehend just how much the Holy Spirit serves us. He is so humble. that God would choose to make His dwelling place, His home, His presence in sinners like me should never not blow my mind. the Spirit deserves so much more credit than i give Him. He is the One responsible for all the refining, purifying, testing, molding that goes on in my heart. He is responsible for every true revelation of Jesus, every touch from the presence of the Almighty, every word spoken from the lips of the Father. He searches out the "deep things" in the heart of God and reveals them to us (1 corinthians 2 vs 10). He carries all things from heaven to us, plants them inside us and is intimately involved in all our growth and love.

when the Spirit comes He brings comfort (john 14 vs 16). He always brings revelation of Jesus (john 14 vs 26) and always glorifies Christ as Lord. He empowers (acts 2). when He is alive and at work in our lives He brings with Him gifts from the Father to bless the church. He helps us bear fruit that is glorifying to Jesus. but what i've loved most about the ministry of the Spirit in my life in this last season has been the truth that "the Spirit helps us in our distress/ weakness" (romans 8 vs 26). He intercedes for us. He prays with groans ununderstandable that the Father hears and responds to. how can it be that we have the Spirit of the Living God, the Eternal Spirit from on high, interceding on our behalf, for our sake.

and this same Holy Spirit wants fellowship with us. i've said "the grace" (2 corinthians 13 vs 14) as its called in my church back home hundreds, if not thousands of times to close a time of worship. but i've never truly thought on the lived out reality of paul's encouragement to let "the fellowship of the Holy Spirit" be with us. He wants communion with us. He wants to be let into every area of our lives so He can bring the truth of Jesus into our broken lives. He wants to bring the Fathers words to us and be there when we respond.

think on that for a second. you are on the Holy Spirit's prayer list today. i am. the Spirit loves us!

we need the Spirit to fill our lives if we are going to live in victory and if we are going to share in the sufferings of Christ best, because we need the joy, peace and comfort of the Holy Spirit to walk through trials as intense as martyrdom.

how do we be filled?

simple...

worship.

"be filled with the Spirit...speak to one another with psalms, hymns and spiritual songs...sing and make music in your heart to the Lord, always giving thanks to God the Father for everything, in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ." (ephesians 5 vs 18-20)

Son.

2009-02-02T11:18:00.003Z

Jesus Christ.

He was Before, He is Now, He will Be.

stained glass windows can never do justice to the beauty and reality of the Resurrection and the Life. and He is so alive. He is Raw and Real. He burns with jealous, unrelenting love for His brothers and sisters. He seeks and saves, defends and delivers, guards and guides. He is fierce in His judgment and tender in His mercy. He is Fire. He is Refuge. He is Song. Terrifying as a Mighty Lion, Innocent as a Gentle Lamb. He is All that is Pure, All that is Perfect, All that is Right and Holy and Just and Good.

one of my friends once asked me what i love most about my Saviour. thats a good question to ask ourselves to consider what He is teaching us about Himself in this moment and season. and its good practice to answer without getting into what can often be empty religious jargan, instead of glorious, beautiful, deep and complex eternal truths. to answer from our broken, needy hearts and say what Jesus means to us in all of our mess and how the revelation of who He is sustains us in our time of trial.

right now what i love about Jesus is that He is one of us. hebrews says...

"it was necessary for Him to be made in every respect like us, His brothers and sisters, so that He could be our merciful and faithful High Priest before God..." (hebrews 2 vs 17)

"...so then, since we have a great High Priest who has entered heaven, Jesus the Son of God, let us hold firmly to what we believe. This High Priest of ours understands our weaknesses, for He faced all of the same testings we do, yet He did not sin." (hebrews 4 vs 14-15)

i love that we can be called His brothers and sisters. when we gather to worship the Father, Jesus is there worshipping alongside us, singing His heart out to our God and His God (john 21 vs 17). when we fall He lifts us like a Perfect Brother. when we're weak He encourages and strengthens us. He is on this eternal journey, suffering and serving the Father with us. He ministers day and night before the Father, and with the Spirit He intercedes on our behalf! that is incredible truth. this is our God. one of us. yet so wholly and Holy different...

...He is the Firstborn from the dead. He Himself, seated above enthroned in His Fathers love right this moment wherever you are, is our Promise that one day we will be resurrected to life with God forever. as the most amazing passage in the bible (in my opinion!) puts so beautifully..."He is the beginning, supreme over all who rise from the dead. So He is first in everything". and there's the challenge and the call of the Person of Christ. the heart of all Christology is a pride piercing, flesh stripping, faith testing question that needs to confront our hearts everyday.

in my life
in my love
in my work
in my rest
in my nation
(the list goes on)...

...is He first in everything?

Father.

2009-02-01T05:49:00.010Z

where do i start when trying to fathom and describe a God so glorious? what could possibly do Him justice, what could begin to speak of His infinite worth and perfect character?

our God has revealed Himself as our Father. God is a Father. i am so blessed to be born in a generation when this revelation of the truth of God's character has been released afresh in amazing ways to the church across the globe. followers of Jesus have experienced anew the depth, the healing and the weight that flows within the reality of the revelation of God as our Father and all that is in His heart for us. the Resurrected Christ told the desperately joyful mary magdalane at the empty tomb to tell the disciples (the early church leaders) that He was going to His Father and her Father (john 20 vs 17). it is this revelation that we share sonship and are heirs to all God's promises with Jesus that Jesus wanted to build His church on. Jesus wanted His followers to know God as Father beyond all else (john 17). it was His prayer and the goal of all His ministry, healing, teaching and mission to reveal the Father heart of God. to unveil the Father and obey Him was central to His living. and so God as our Father should be so central to ours.

the new convenant brought with it a new access to intimacy with the Father of eternity (john 1 vs 14). when Jesus taught His followers to pray, He told them to pray to 'Father' (matthew 6 vs 9). we pray to our Daddy, the One who loves us and delights in us as His adopted sons and daughters. He listens and answers because He loves us so much. we can call Him 'Abba', Papa, crying out to Him with pure and broken hearts no matter how we feel (romans 8 vs 15), approaching His throne of grace with confidence and boldness because we know we come as royalty (hebrews 4 vs 16).

He longs to hold us (2 samuel 22 vs 17),
carry us (deuteronomy 33 vs 13),
comfort us (2 corinthians 1 vs 4),
play with us (hosea 11 vs 3),
encourage us (isaiah 40 vs 29),
affirm us (matthew 3 vs 17),
lift us (psalm 3 vs 3),
lead us (psalm 23 vs 3),
defend us (deuteronomy 10 vs 18),
calm our fears (zephaniah 3 vs 16),
deliver us (psalm 40 vs 2),
protect us (deuteronomy 23 vs 14),
speak to us (1 samuel 3 vs 9),
teach us (isaiah 2 vs 3),
discipline us (hebrews 12 vs 7),
give to us all He has promised (romans 8 vs 17),
heal us (exodus 15 vs 26),
honour us (james 4 vs 5),
sing over us (zephaniah 3 vs 17),
lavish His love on us (1 john 3 vs 1),
provide for us (matthew 6 vs 32),
give us gifts (james 1 vs 17),
be intimate with us (hosea 11 vs 8),
show us amazing things (jeremiah 33 vs 3).

He has incredible plans for us (jeremiah 29 vs 11). He is the perfect Father (matthew 5 vs 48). He is the God who's heart broke with pride and anguish as He watched His One and Only Son suffer and die for the sake of billions of lost, empty, disobedient children. can you imagine the dispair and sorrow in His heart as He sees His kids get caught up in all sorts of evil that lead them away from Him? but who can fathom the joy that fills His courts above when one of these wandering ones returns. i think some of the most beautiful salvation verses in the bible are luke 15 vs 22-24 as we glimpse our Father rejoice and restore us...

"But the father said to his servants, 'Quick! Bring the best robe and put it on him. Put a ring on his finger and sandals on his feet. Bring the fattened calf and kill it. Let's have a feast and celebrate. For this son of mine was dead and is alive again; he was lost and is found.' So they began to celebrate."

this revelation of God as Father changes everything. we were made not only to love, as i can so often emphasise as a worship leader, but also to be loved. we are so loved (john 3 vs 16). love comforts, excites, stirs, breaks, heals, unites, restores, revives, messes up, chases after. the Fathers love is one that both waits patiently and pursues passionately (luke 15 vs 20). His love is full of compassion and mercy. He never gives up on us. He yearns for us. all that is within Him is aroused by our movements towards and away from Him (hosea 11). He is both emotional and steady, moved as a Lover, firm as a Rock. He is so delighted when we serve Him and bring Him our pathetic little scribbled drawings of worship that look like rubbish to the rest of the world but looks like love to Him. He loves spending time with us, going for long walks with us, sitting with us, buidling stuff for His Kingdom with us, playing a game with us.

stand in awe of this Holy King, our Father. stand in awe of this Faithful Dad, the One who will never let us go and who picks us up and dusts us off when we fall. stand in awe of YAHWEH, the LORD, Abba - who cuddles us and wants the best for us.

Hallowed be Thy Name

2009-01-30T13:07:00.000Z

i've realized, looking back on some of my blog posts recently that i spend alot of time meditating on and talking about the church, personal devotion and discipleship disciplines like prayer, worship and bible reading. all of these things are strongly imprinted on my heart and genuinely burden me day in day out, but i've realised that if i just focus on those things then a massive imbalance takes place where i take my eyes of worshipping Jesus, the Son of Man and i begin to idolise my spirituality. dryness, apathy and laziness can so easily slip in when we take our eyes off the Majesty of Heaven. this has really hit me recently, and so i want to take the whole of febuary's blogging to focus on the Person and Character of our God. i'm sure things like church, devotion and discipleship will flow as a result of gazing upon our Father, becuase whenever He revealed Himself in the bible it demanded a response from people's lives of deeper love, diligent prayer, dangerous mission and desperate repentance. but i want to know Him. just to know Him and love Him is enough. it was enough for moses, david, paul and countless other saints throughout His-story. and its enough for me.

one of my most vivid early worship memories is singing 'all i once held dear', the kendrick classic in church as a kid after a sermon about how jacob wrestled with God because he was desperate to know Him. i can remember getting to the words 'knowing You Jesus, knowing You..there is no greater thing' and vowing to make the pursuit of knowing Him the goal of my life. so this next month i want to try my best to put that back at the centre knowing Him for the sake of loving Him.

i'd encourage any readers/ followers of my blog to consider and pray about doing the same thing, making februarys blog entries completely dedicated and focussed on the perfection of our Father in heaven...

The one thing I ask of the Lord—
the thing I seek most—
is to live in the house of the Lord all the days of my life,
delighting in the Lord’s perfections
and meditating in his Temple (psalm 27 vs 4)

As for God, His way is perfect;
the word of the LORD is flawless.
He is a shield
for all who take refuge in Him (psalm 18 vs 30 // 2 samuel 22 vs 31)

night watch

2009-01-25T04:04:00.003Z

"watch and pray so that you will not fall into temptation. The spirit is willing, but the body is weak." (matthew 26 vs 41)

its 4 o'clock in the morning. i'm still awake. being alive in the stillness of this time of the day has made me realize how precious a time to seek the Lord this is. even tonight, that hasn't been what i've been doing. but that has really challenged me. i guess this post is the sequel to the last in that so often, as a student especially, i think we idolise sleep. sleep is an amazing gift and refreshes and restores us physically, emotionally and spiritually. and our Father can sometimes get our attention better when we're dreaming than when we're caught up in our busy lives. but sleep should never come above being with Him. like the disciples in the garden, there will be times when God calls us to watch and pray in active submission and fervent devotion when the rest of the world is asleep. i find it too easy letting tiredness, my body being weak dictate my desperation for a touch from heaven.

last night i read the story of jacob wrestling with the Lord all through the night (genesis 32). God had formed such a stubborn and determined heart within jacob that his cry was "i wont let go until you bless me". that is worship. worship that wont let go, wont give up, wont rest until true rest is won. he wrestled and struggled all night with God. all night. when was the last time i can say that of my walk with Jesus- that i wrestled with Him, embraced Him, clung to Him so tightly in the place of prayer that hours past and i hadn't given up and gone to bed? God honoured jacob's committment by giving him a new name and blessing his reconciliation with his brother. not only that, but jacobs testimony was that he had seen God face to face.

Jesus is seeking followers who will be loyal to Him in the garden of gethsemanes ahead. the times where He asks us to share the burdens of His heart by praying through the night so that temptation doesnt overtake us. He is looking for those who, like jacob, are not afraid to have bold and tenacious faith when it comes to pursuing His Person and priorities. people who will walk through wilderness, storm, valley and fire just to hold on to Him and see His face.

i feel so far from that kind of faith right now Father. by Your Spirit, for Your glory and in Your mercy i pray that You would fill me with that passion for Your presence. its all i truly need. may i be able to say "i lie awake thinking of You, meditating on You through the night" (psalm 63 vs 6)

find rest, O my soul

2009-01-23T01:09:00.005Z

the world fights for power. the world battles hard day and night for the accumulation influence, treasure, pleasure and success. seeking after fame and purpose, the world won't give up in its relentless pursuit of dead, demonic, temporary idols. the followers of the world exhaust themselves in the fight for these things, spending their lives pouring out their all, gripped by the battle to make their lives count in the here and now.

God's people have a battle too. we are to be gripped by a cause. we are to fight with all we have within us and all we have been given to win the prize. we fight for what is eternal. we fight for more of Him and less of us. we fight for treasure in heaven.

we fight for rest.

"God’s promise of entering His rest still stands, so we ought to tremble with fear that some of you might fail to experience it. For this good news—that God has prepared this rest—has been announced to us...let us therefore strive to enter that rest" (hebrews 4 vs 1-2, 11 NLT//ESV)

in a generation of depression, troubled minds, crushing work-loads, emotional turmoil, relational burdens, hopelessness, sleepless nights and fear and weakness, there is a rallying battle cry that echoes above and among weary hearts...God's promise of entering His rest still stands. as the writer of hebrews says, this promise of rest is the very heart of the gospel- it is the good news. He has set aside a place at His feet, by His side in His presence where there is fullness of joy for us to come and enter rest. rest is an active thing. i think we have to acknowledge that so often laziness gets in the way of true rest. laziness isn't only a cheap replacement for the real thing, its actually an enemy of rest because it robs us of the benefits of true rest which can only be found in God. and that rest takes work to enter. the writer of hebrews talked about the importance of not becoming lazy in the pursuit of obedience so that we dont miss out on God's eternal rest. david commanded his own inner-man to stop raging within him when he said 'find rest, O my soul in God alone' (psalm 62). it takes discipline. it takes force. it takes striving, battling against all that does and will come against us from inside and around us, giving everything to cast off distractions to run towards the arms of Rest.

and Jesus is our Rest. He is the Great Burden-Bearer, the One who invites us simply to come and lay ourselves out before Him. He is the One who gives us an easy load to carry. its like we're little children, crushed beneath the weight of our sin and our enemy, too much for us to handle- an adult portion of stuff to carry. but when we bring it to our Jesus, He takes that weight upon Himself and gives us His burden to carry- joy and intimacy with the Father. i guess that is the Divine exchange of the cross. our restlessness for His rest.

the enemy trembles in the face of a child of God at rest in Him. because from that place of rest the child abides and when the child abides, obedience flows. from that place of rest the fruits of the Spirit are free to grow as the Gardener waters and the Vine gives life. and as love, peace, joy grow, power flows. God's power. and that terrifies our enemy. God's power in human weakness. all from the place of rest and security bought by the Saviours blood, found in the Fathers embrace and sealed with the Spirits nearness.

i need to do more in my life to pursue the place of rest and let it invade every part of me deep within. only then will i be fully alive in Him, as i let His rest wash over me and fill me.

strive for rest.

gift to a bride in waiting

2009-01-16T00:51:00.005Z

one day this world will bow. kings, peasants, mountains, oceans, young and old, weak and stong, tribes and nations all before the Ancient throne. one day the church will be pure and spotless, blameless and holy. all because they see Him. one day tears will be wiped, storms will be stilled, orphans will find the perfect Father, widows will find a Faithful Bridegroom. one day our hearts will be satisfied. one day our eyes will see Him. on that day we'll see Him as He is - Bright, Glorious, Radiant, Beautiful, Perfect, Blazing, Holy. there will be a day when we see our Jesus face to face.

this moment that only seems imaginable will be a living reality. in a moment everything will change. eternity will flood our mortal bodies and we will be with our Maker, our Rescuer, our Comforter. forever.

until that day the church has been given a gift (amongst many) from her Lord. this gift is a one word prayer. the Father invites us to join in with the very cry of His Spirit in calling out to Him with hearts and voices united in desperation and love. as disciples across the globe He beckons us to beckon Him..."Come".

"The Spirit and the bride say, 'Come.' Let anyone who hears this say, 'Come.' Let anyone who is thirsty come. Let anyone who desires drink freely from the water of life...He who is the Faithful Witness to all these things says, 'Yes, I am coming soon!' Amen! Come, Lord Jesus!" (revelation 22 vs 17 + 20)

there's an urgency that needs to be awakened in us as Christ's bride. i love so much how nearly the last words in the bible and the very last prayer of the church here on earth is "come, Lord Jesus!". i love the sense of excitement and anticipation that there is within the cry for Jesus to return and make all things new. i've heard it said that the church needs to be lovesick in our devotion to our Lord. like the beloved in the song of songs we need the same abandon and urgency that caused her to say 'All night long on my bed i looked for the one my heart loves' (song of songs 3 vs 1). too often and for too long we (i) slip in to compromise and apathy, giving up on extravagant and persistent devotion. we have short bursts of utter, poured out, surrendering love but then we settle back into middle class, evangelical life. we need persevering love. that is the love that lives the cry "come". love that is longing and enduring.

i've heard it been said that the cry for Jesus to come works on three levels (the 3rd being the most theologically in line with the passage above!)...

"come near us" (intimacy...the great commandment)

we cry "come" for our Jesus to come close to us, to hold us, embrace us, speak to us, sing over us, be near us, carry us. whenever we gather to worship Him we need to ask Him to "come" and be amongst us by His Holy Spirit. He promises that where two or three gather in His name, for His sake, He will be there (matthew 18 vs 20). thats amazing. the Son of God, ascended and exalted wants to be amongst us and working in us. He loves to be intimate with us. He is the Perfect Lover, jealous and faithful forever. and His jealousy is very good news because it means He wont give up in the pursuit of making us wholly His and in protecting us from all other loves that will destroy us. james says that when we come near and draw close to God, He responds in the same way to us (james 4 vs 8). He is moved by our movements towards Him (hosea 2) and He promises His people that He will be intimate with them and share the secrets of His heart when they pursue Him (psalm 25 vs 14 + john 17 vs 24).

"come to us" (revival...the great commission)

hosea 6 vs 1-3 speaks prophetically of Jesus' resurrection and contain some amazing promises about revival...'come let us return to the Lord...after two days He will revive us...that we may live in his presence...as surely as the sun rises, He will appear; He will come to us like the winter rains, like the spring rains that water the earth'. as we return to that place of intimacy with Him through repentance (revelation 2 vs 4-5) He will revive us. and as He revives us He will bring revival to our land and nations (2 chronicles 7 vs 14). we need to call out to Jesus, that He would rend the heavens and come down, bringing His salvation, His grace, His healing and His justice. even as i write this i'm really challenged as to how much i truly desire God to come to us in power. when He awakens the dead everything has to change. priorities, motives, pleasures all get turned upside down when Jesus walks into a place by His Spirit calling for new levels of discipleship (luke 9 vs 24) and displaying His power. but as He comes to us, He brings His Kingdom, making the broken new (luke 10 vs 9).

"come for us" (second coming...the great conclusion)

our Father is preparing a people for His Son who will so have their sights set on things above (colossians 3 vs 1-3) that they will cry out for the return of their King. the church in the western world is so often so comfortable with all their possessions and achievements that they forget that we should see departing and being with Christ as far better than anything in this world (philippians 1 vs 23). the thessalonian church were constantly commended for how they were waiting for the return of Jesus with eager anticipation (1 thessalonians 1 vs 10). wanting God to wrap things up and take us home is a legitimate, even needed desire. this doesn't in anyway take away from this life, our mission here on earth or our enjoyment of all the blessings our Father pours on us in the here and now. but we need our hearts to be where the true treasure is, with Christ in heaven (matthew 6 vs 20-21). He is our treasure and therefore our delight should be with Him. and when He comes all will be well forever. we will truly be home and at peace. isn't that something to long for with everything within us? so much so that we can be that lovesick bride that cries "come" and lives with an urgency that that day is coming soon and there are many who wont be coming to the marriage supper of the Lamb unless someone (us) invites them. the great commission and the great commandment need to be lived in the light of the great conclusion...Jesus is coming again.

yes...come, Lord Jesus!

The grace of the Lord Jesus be with God's people. Amen. (revelation 22 vs 21)

the church

2009-01-10T17:44:00.008Z

set apart,
you were chosen from the world
God's own workmanship revealed
in sinners sanctified

called 'so loved',
bought with blood to be His bride
broken lives hidden in Christ
God's joy, crown and delight

O beloved, O Christ's bride
you are called to be a light
to declare the praises of
the One who led you out,
the One who led you out

let us shine,
as a city on a hill
seek His Kingdom and His will
love our neighbours as ourselves

holy church,
rise with courage to proclaim
our King's coming back again
awake and hasten the great day

sing beloved, sing Christ's bride
we are called to be a light
we declare the praises of
the One who led us out,
the One who led us out

the moravians // part 5: the moravian mantle

2009-01-08T11:28:00.000Z

here ends my series on the incredibly faithful bunch of radically obedient Christ followers known as the moravians...

reading about the moravians has brought me to the place of asking the question of where the moravians are in this generation? where are the people who will carry the fire of God, who will live devoted to fellowship, prayer, mission and worship even if it leads to persecution and death? where are the prayer warriors that will stand in the gap, feeling the emotions of God for the lost and hurting, crying out in intercession for the reformation of society and for revival in the church? where are those who will live with disciplined holiness and devotion as an overflow of thankfulness and adoration for the grace shown to them by the Risen Saviour? where are the individuals that will contend for the fullness of God now? where is the church that will love, the church that will stir up, the church that will lay down, the church with courage, the church that will pray till their knees bleed, the church that will preach with such authority and sing with such passion that their voice is strained but full of clarity and urgency, where is the church that will worship so wholeheartedly that they are emptied of all pride and filled with the Spirit, the church that walks in power because it has first been humbled and submissive? where is this bride of Christ?

we are to be this bride of Christ. we are His chosen people, His royal priesthood, His holy nation. we are a people belonging to God, held in the palm of His hands, chosen and adopted in His mercy and prepared to be His hands and feet.

one massive thing that has stood out all the way about zinzendorf and his crew is that they never once lived to please man. they gave up riches, reputation and worldly security in order to be pleasing to their Father in heaven. in todays church, especially in the UK we have got ourselves stuck into a subtle and dangerous mindset that the way forward in our outreach is through being more culturally relevant, less obtrusive, more pleasing and attractive to the interests of this culture. we think we're winning the favour of God by putting on events that will bring people in and make us look good. king david was one of the most successful and favoured men of God in history, and it was all because he set his heart first and foremost on pleasing His Lord. it was in the undivided pursuit of Jesus that he found anointing on the works of his hands. daniel and joseph were the same. they did nothing to win powerful positions for themselves in order to be witnesses for God in high places. they were simply faithful in pleasing God where they were, wherever that was and it led to blessing. we've bought into the lie that by dressing up the church we are helping the reputation and attraction of the gospel, when actually all we're doing is inviting people into a kingdom of comfort, ease, compromise and entertainment. a kingdom of consumerism and prosperity. cant we see that we're just living to please man and clientele? we're dressing up the gospel in rags of glitz and glamor that actually stand in opposition to the glorious, simple, beautiful yet complex truth that those who want to gain their lives will lose them and those who lose their lives for Jesus and love for Him will gain them eternally.

the call of the moravian prayer watch is a call to wake up and forsake the things that are passing for the sake of giving our lives to the eternal, to the only thing that truly matters - following and serving the King, loving one another and building the true Kingdom of God. the call of the moravians is to actually give all to living the prayer "let Your Kingdom come, let Your will be done on earth as it is in heaven".

lets hear the call and pray for the grace, mercy, humility and strength to live it.

thank You for the moravians, Father.

the moravians // part 4: the mustard seed

2009-01-07T10:52:00.000Z

"Again He said, "What shall we say the kingdom of God is like, or what parable shall we use to describe it? It is like a mustard seed, which is the smallest seed you plant in the ground. Yet when planted, it grows and becomes the largest of all garden plants, with such big branches that the birds of the air can perch in its shade." (mark 4 vs 30-32)

Jesus Christ described His Father's Kingdom as a seed. a tiny, seemingly insignificant mustard seed. it starts small. hidden underground, its movements are unseen and unnoticed at first. it is crushed beneath the soil, exposed to little sun light and utterly dependent on water to survive. but in it there is so much potential for outrageous growth. growth that sees this minuscule seed transform into an amazing plant that brings shade and beauty to all. a plant who's roots go deep into the soil and who's fruit is born through every season.

inspired by this parable, count zinzendorf formed 'the order of the mustard seed', way before the moravian movement even began. still a student, the count felt a strong call and desire to gather like-hearted people around him, men who would keep him accountable and encourage him to be faithful to Christ. this tiny group grew rapidly, until thousands from all around the globe made the mustard seed commitment, to be faithful in the small things. the aims of the order were simple... to be true to Christ, kind to all people and to spread news of the Gospel to the world. but the affect it had on lives and communities was completely transforming.

what can be achieved if we are faithful in the small things and in sowing our lives into the soil of God's presence and truth is beyond imagination. if we would only turn our big dreams into small, but significant acts of service and love i have no doubt we would see a seed become a tree in our lives and in our churches in this day.

the moravians // part 3: to the ends of the earth

2009-01-06T01:08:00.000Z

the lasting legacy of the moravian prayer movement was not simply that they prayed non-stop, around the clock for 100 years (although that is beyond incredible in itself), but that as a result of all that interceding and crying out to the courts of heaven for a revival move on the earth, they sent out missionaries. what shocked me when reading about this bunch of 300 men and women who were determined to know Christ and make Him known was that virtually all our modern day missionary strategies come from the moravians. they sent out more missionaries than the entire protestant church had done before. there are stories of how these peasants, most of them without any theological training (which was unheard of for anyone in any type of 'ministry' in those days), gave their lives, many of them unto death, so that the world would know their Saviour. they lived out Jesus call to His disciples - that they would wait in jerusalem until they had received the gift from His Father of the Holy Spirit so that they could be His witnesses "to the ends of the earth" (acts 1). when the power of the Holy Spirit came He found the disciples just as He longs to finds us- in the place of prayer, ready, willing, waiting for the call of God to send us out. they were fearless and full of supernatural boldness as they went to nations that needed Christ so much and lived lives of faithfulness, service and perseverance, sometimes working or building or serving for years before having the opportunity to share the love of God. they were beaten, imprisoned, suffered sickness and martyred.

one man in particular, Leonard Dober, stand out to me as an example of what the moravians were prepared to go through in order to preach the good news to the lost. dober had felt a strong call on his life to minister in the caribbean after hearing stories of the way slaves suffered out there. in 1731 the opportunity opened up for the first moravian missionaries to go to an island called st thomas. they drew lots and dober was chosen, along with another man, to go. there was a little bit of a catch though. slave-owners had called themselves 'christians' and therefore there was a natural tendancy towards distrust amongst the slaves when it came to christains. in order to reach them, the herrnhut missionaries would have to sell themselves into slavery. with fearless faith, dober declared "if to win souls to the Lamb i must be a slave, then a slave i shall be". dober spent years working on plantations, causing trouble by loving the loveless, singing hymns joyfully and preaching the good news.

the stories of salvation and reformation as a result of the moravian missionary movement are countless and soul stirring. i long for that faith, that love for Jesus, that boldness that is willing to be a martyr and live in such a way that it is possible that i may be. He deserves nothing less.

the moravians // part 2: a community of prayer

2009-01-05T14:39:00.002Z

since writing my last post i've continued to read the book about count zinzendorf and have been so gripped and inspired by what i'm reading that i thought i'd do a few more blog posts on this amazing 18th century community known as the moravians. the move of God that started in a valley in germany during the 1720's was a true phenomenon. God won the hearts of persecuted refugees in such a united way that their 100 year long continuous prayer, abandoned worship and intense fellowship propelled missionaries with fire and love to the ends of the earth. the book is called "the lord of the ring : a journey in search of count zinzendorf" and is written by a guy called phil anderson as part of 24-7 prayer titles. highly recommend it.

one of the things that i have been really stirred about over the past few months is the idea of sowing my life not just into my ministry but into a movement. labouring with all my love, work and gifts to see a generation marked by the same heart and devotion for Christ. paul prayed that the philippian church would "make his joy complete" by "working together with one heart and purpose" (philippians 2 vs 2). he charged them to "stay away from complaining and arguing...to live clean, innocent lives as children of God in a dark world" (philippians 2 vs 14-15). Jesus Himself prayed that His church would be one - one with Him, one with the Father, one with each other - all for the purpose that "the world will believe that You {the Father} sent Me {Jesus}" (john 17 vs 21). this idea of a unified, united movement standing for the truth and love of God may be bigger than i tend to make it in my own life.

perhaps the most famous passage that we use to describe what a community of believers should look like is found at the end of acts 2 (vs 42-47)...

"All the believers devoted themselves to the apostles’ teaching, and to fellowship, and to sharing in meals (including the Lord’s Supper), and to prayer. A deep sense of awe came over them all, and the apostles performed many miraculous signs and wonders. And all the believers met together in one place and shared everything they had. They sold their property and possessions and shared the money with those in need. They worshiped together at the Temple each day, met in homes for the Lord’s Supper, and shared their meals with great joy and generosity— all the while praising God and enjoying the goodwill of all the people. And each day the Lord added to their fellowship those who were being saved."

i could expand on each individual part of that picture of the early church but it would probably end up having to be a blog post for each. a community laid on the foundation of teaching, fellowship, sharing, the Lord's supper, prayer, awe, miracles, giving to those in need, worship, joy, generosity, praise, salvation. wow. in our generation weve made 'the christian bubble' an enemy of our evangelism, often ignoring that 'the christian bubble' is in the bible, in the passage above. its just we dont know how to function properly as a community that is both incredibly inward and incredibly outreaching.

the moravians had the balance. they, like the early church not only had a continuos 24/7 prayer watch where they would intercede for their nation, for each other, for missionaries, for the nations and for the fatherless and oppressed, but they also had a deep and disciplined sense of authentic community built on accountability, kindness and prayer. what i had never realised about the moravians is that they were a bunch of refugees from the last remnant of a revival movement that had take place hundreds of years before, called the bohemian brethren. they had been persecuted and exiled from all over the place, and zinzendorf (as a noble with lots of cash) took them in and built a community for them from scratch. the moravian community was set apart for the purpose of being a praying, obedient people. over time tensions between different doctrinal groups developed, threatening to destroy the unity of the community. until one sunday morning service in may 1727, the Spirit of God fell powerfully as all the believers took communion together and confessed their sins to each other. they worshipped spontaneously for hours. this was just the first-fruits of what the community would become. over time they formed 'choirs' (zinzendorf wrote over 1000 hymns), daily prayer meetings, daily devotionals, daily teaching and daily accountability groups. it was intense. there was a constant sense of divine presence that pervaded every aspect of community life, all of their work, all of their meetings, everything. everyone had equal status, they had elders to govern over community and spiritual matters but there was no sense of anyone lording it over anyone. the Lamb was the Centre and the Head of the moravians in a very real sense, it was nameless and faceless move of God. and what was most amazing about have a foundation of prayer was that when the moravians felt God's call to foreign lands like the caribbean, iceland, laplan, south africa or south america, they left knowing that they would be supported and uplifted before the throne day and night by their brothers and sisters back in herrnhut. john wesley said of the place "here i continuously met what i sought for: living proofs of the power of faith". must have been immense.

rarely, if ever have i seen such a demonstration of unity, fellowship and Christ-centered community as was shown by the moravians in herrnhut or the early church in jerusalem, but it must be beautiful, like a glimpse of heaven on earth. and so its worth contending for in this life. anytime we have an opportunity to answer the prayer of Jesus and His disciples down the ages, that the Fathers Kingdom rule and reign would come and the desires of His heart would be fulfilled on earth as they are where He dwells is worth giving our lives for. im just trying to imagine what it would look like in my own life. i got a snapshot this summer at a retreat with 6 of my closest friends and brothers in the world. it was incredible. i pray that somehow acts 2 would invade the fabric of my everyday life as a student this year. that we would take up the mantle of the moravians and be a true community of prayer.

the moravians // part 1: a man of prayer

2009-01-01T19:32:00.006Z

i'm reading a book at the moment about a guy called count nikolous ludwig von zinzendorf. pretty cool name for a pretty amazing man of God.

zinzendorf spearheaded the 100 year 24/7 moravian prayer watch. a small community in a place called herrnhut (means 'the Lord's watch') in germany committed themselves to continuous prayer, ministering before the Lord day and night, raising up their thanksgiving and cries for revival. the result of the fervency and passion of the moravian prayer warriors was a revival that shook the world. in a period of 10 years, the moravian church sent out more missionaries worldwide than the whole protestant church in germany had sent out in hundreds of years before. these consecrated hearts would go to the ends of the earth, forsaking riches, education and comfort to sell themselves into slavery, learn new languages, sail perilous oceans, all with the anthem and heart cry - 'may the Lamb that was slain receive the reward of His sufferings'. they truly knew what it was to live out the greatest commandment of loving God with all and loving others as ourselves, and the great commission of taking the good news of the salvation found in Christ alone to all the earth. the moravians were committed, with everything they were, to living as an authentic Christ-centered, outreaching community and to making disciples of all nations who would love Jesus with holy, burning, submissive and fearless love.

reading of the life of zinzendorf and the moravians has reminded me yet again of the truth that a life lived well is a life lived in the place of prayer, learning to be wholly obedient to Christ and then getting up off our knees and standing firm for Christ in the world, through passionate proclamation of the glory of the gospel. at the beginning of 2008 i can remember asking God to make me a man of prayer. like the disciples i came to Jesus and said "Lord, teach me how to pray" (luke 11 vs 1). they had seen Jesus for years healing the sick, raising the dead, preaching the good news of the Kingdom and teaching with authority. and they had discovered that 'prayer is the secret to power' (evan roberts). all the amazingly used jars of clay down the ages have been weak men and women who have simply known that prayer is everything. look at the lives of those in the bible - daniel, david, moses, elijah, paul. all of them are absolute heroes, and all of them knew that the pursuit of God, not just the things of God but God Himself, was the most precious desire they had in life.

God has taken me on a journey this past 12 months where He has reminded me that my strength is found in weakness and in the discipline of being constantly before Him in prayer, worship and studying His word. through all the battles i have faced in 2008 He has been so faithful and He has shown me that prayer is firstly one of my best weapons, and secondly the thing that the enemy will most want to steal because its when we pray that we are most dangerous, because its in the place of prayer that the Holy Spirit can have free reign in our hearts to cultivate radical, trusting, bold love for Jesus and His Kingdom. as john piper says, 'Until you know that life is war, you cannot know what prayer is for'.

it was said of zinzendorf that he had kept a strong discipline of prayer, worship and bible study since his youth. i want the same to be said of me at the end of my life, not for the sake of looking self-righteous or religious at all. those things are horrible. but for the sake of a life of devotion showing a deeper heart of devotion, sustained by daily coming before the Lord and saying 'i am Yours'.

as i look forward into 2009 my prayer is the same..."Father, make me a man of prayer. let me fellowship so intimately with the Holy Spirit that He is the One who is interceding for me with groans too deep for words to express. hide me away in the secret place of devotion this year, so that whenever i am not there i burn with the fire You have lit by Your word and Your presence in that place. for the sake of the glory of Your Son, let Your will be done."

my prayer is the same for all of you. that we would be a generation who seek the face of the Almighty through every season and depend completely on His faithfulness and grace.

a call for wholehearted commitment

2008-12-27T23:13:00.003Z

deuteronomy is one of those books in the bible i think i could spend my life on and never fully explore the depths and live the truths that lie in the words written by moses. i think it is so so relevant to God's people right now. its a book of remembering how good God has been and instructing God's people of how to live in the light of that. its Yahweh's heart for His covenant people, ransomed and rescued out of egypt through "trials, miraculous signs, wonders, war, a strong hand, a powerful arm, and terrifying acts" (deuteronomy 4 vs 34), and His expressed desire on how they should love, live and worship in order to enjoy His blessing and be a light to the rest of the world. last night i read deuteronomy 6 and it challenged me massively. it made me first examine my own heart and life before the Lord and then made me pray for the church in this generation - that it would be a church that breathed deuteronomy 6.

but before chapter 6 came chapter 1, 2, 3, 4 and 5. and i dont think i'm ready to live out the call of chapter 6 until i've started with remembering. i think its amazing how moses starts by reminding the people in chapter 1-4 of how the Lord has been faithful to them and delivered them from their enemies. it always needs to start there in our own lives. before we even begin to ponder how we should live before God we need to get down on our knees and remind ourselves of His truly amazing grace. ephesians 4 vs 8 says of Jesus that "when He ascended to the heights, He led a crowd of captives and gave gifts to His people". He has ascended. He has led us out. and He has given us gifts. its all His initiation. He is our Beginning. and He will be our End. His blood sealed the new covenant between God and His adopted children, His heirs, His chosen people. so often i trip up in my own life because i forget His grace and mercy. i forget that it is finished and i am His, for better or worse, richer or poorer, in sickness and in health. i am His to have and to hold, to be loved and cherished. when i remember that i am forgiven, that my sins were crucified with Christ and that i have been baptised and raised to new life in His Spirit, seated with my Jesus in the heavenly realms...thats when im ready to hear the call of deuteronomy 6.

i love what the title of chapter 6 is in my NLT bible...'a call for wholehearted commitment'. thats enough in itself to make me stop in my tracks and start repenting and asking the Holy Spirit to win my heart anew. ive been thinking alot again recently about how lukewarm the church is in my generation. comfort and ease have become idols. consumer culture has flooded our churches and glamour and glitz have stolen away our fascination with the Living God and the beauty of His presence and word. imagine a church who truly heard and truly heeded the call for wholehearted commitment to Jesus. in luke 18 Christ Himself lamented over the state of discipleship... "when the Son of Man comes, will He find faith on the earth?". He's desperate to come back finding a people who have been so one with the Father that true faith has been formed in them. true faith that says, 'i believe who You are in Your fullness, so i'm going to live for You with my fullness'. chapter 6 of deuteronomy goes on to summon us as disciples of the Way to some pretty huge things...

you must love the Lord your God with all your heart, all your soul, and all your strength.

you must commit yourselves wholeheartedly to these commands.

you must diligently obey the commands of the Lord your God.

you must not worship any of the gods of neighboring nations.

i love that is goes on to tell the people of God to "repeat them again and again to your children" and "talk about them when you are at home and when you are on the road, when you are going to bed and when you are getting up" and to even "tie them to your hands and wear them on your forehead as reminders". learning to live these commands was to invade every aspect of the israelite life. it was to BE the life of the people of God. thinking really close to home, it makes me wonder how much i'm living this with my christian friends. how diligently do i pursue wholeheartedness and how diligently do i spure my community of brothers and sisters on to pursue wholeheartedness? i had a picture when i was thinking and praying about this last night of a cold tap being turned on over a blazing candle and the candle trying to fight the dampening of the water but in the end just being too weak and going out. we've got to fight distractions that come against us living wholeheartedly for God, because of all He's done for us. we must blaze for Him, burn for Him. this is the call of the church and this is the call on my life - wholehearted commitment. it starts with me and i know i've been far from it this past week. Father, help me.

---

Jesus is returning for a wholehearted church. a church on fire. a lovesick bride. a people who unite with the heart cry of the Holy Spirit Himself, desperate for the revelation and reformation brought only by the Risen Son of God..."Come!" (revelation 22 vs 17). He is waiting for sold out, laid down, yielded, given over, surrendered, abandoned holy remnant to seek Him with their whole hearts and lives (acts 15 vs 17). lukewarmness has no place in the Kingdom of God. for the Kingdom of God is a Kingdom built on luke 9 vs 24...those who lose their lives for the sake of Jesus will gain their lives.

that is wholehearted commitment.

a life laid down

2008-12-20T12:08:00.003Z

in the hours leading up to the cross, Jesus spoke these penetrating, summoning words to His closest disciples,

"Greater love has no one than this, that he lay down his life for his friends" (john 15 vs 13)

the greatest love, the essence of devotion, the costliest act of affection is found in a life laid down. pride and love lay out on the floor in deep submission before the One who taught us what a life laid down looks like when He emptied Himself of Eternal Royalty on that cruel cross.

what does a life laid down look like? for me, it looks like getting up every morning and kneeling before the Risen Christ, the Living God who sees me and knows me completely, opening the hands of my heart before Him and crying "You say what stays and what goes". i offer up my dreams, my desires, my crowns, my tears, my fears, my joys, my friends, my affections, my very life breath. whether i leave that place of prayer empty handed, with nothing but love for Him in my heart or if i leave that place with Spirit gifts and Kingdom strategy from my Lord makes no difference. He is just delighted that i have been there with Him. the sacrifices God desires are broken spirits, cracked, emptied at His feet (psalm 51 vs 17). john the baptist once claimed that his greatest joy was in Jesus being greater and him being less (john 3 vs 29-30). that is a life laid down. joy found in the glory and honour of the Lamb upon the throne. there is nothing quite like surrender.

restoring the tabernacle of david

2008-12-16T15:17:00.006Z

i'm taking a few days this week to really seek the Lord in prayer as this year draws to an end. i'm listening to jason upton's song "fly" on repeat - awesome prayer song with an angel singing in the background...pretty amazing. and i'm just laying my life down at the feet of Jesus and asking Him where He wants me to go, who He's called me to be and what He wants me to do, particularly with a relationship, my future, how to serve Him and love Him best with where i am and whats He's burdened my heart with over the last year. i just want Him to strip away all within me that doesnt love Him. i want Him to empty me of all but His Spirit and love. i'm praying that He'll reveal His heart, His way and His glory to me afresh. and i want Him to remind me of who i am in Him. i feel like this year has been the year that i've made the transition from the shepherd boy worshipping Jesus out in the fields to the man of God who is battling on the front-lines for Him. one of the meanings of my name is 'warrior'. i feel like God has been teaching me what it means to be a worship warrior this past year. to fight for His glory, knowing that He is defending me and fighting for me, to rest in the assurance that ultimately the battle is the Lord's and not mine.

one of the things that He's stirred in me as i've been before Him is the call i feel on my life to 'restore the tabernacle of david'. that sounds very fancy and religious and probably meaningless. but it has so much depth. a few years ago a guy spoke over me that i would restore david's tabernacle in this generation. i was excited because it mentioned king david, one of my heros, and because it sounded pretty cool. but in reality i had no idea what it meant! and i'm still learning. but basically the restoration of the tabernacle of david is the church. in acts 15, the apostle james quotes from amos 9, relating it to the church...

" 'After this I will return
and rebuild David's fallen tent.
Its ruins I will rebuild,
and I will restore it,
that the remnant of men may seek the Lord,
and all the Gentiles who bear my name,
says the Lord, who does these things'
that have been known for ages."

one of God's mandates for the church in these last days is that we would 'rebuild david's fallen tent' - david's tabernacle. the tabernacle of david was a jewish system of worship adopted during the reign of king david on mount zion in jerusalem, to house the ark of the covenant. the sacrifices made at the tabernacle of david were generations ahead of their time. they werent animals, but praise, thanksgiving and song. priests and musicians would minister before the Lord day and night, singing, dancing and worshipping in His glorious presence. as www.zionsong.org puts it...

"Jesus fulfilled the sacrificial system of the Old Covenant by His death on the cross (Hebrews 1:3, 7:27, 9:12, 9:24-28). The sacrifices of the Church, the New Covenant priesthood, are the sacrifices of praise, joy and thanksgiving (Hebrews 13:15, 1 Peter 2:9). In addition to the worship of the Church, the Tabernacle of David points to the proclamation and authority of Christ through His Church, thus foreshadowing the priestly, kingly and prophetic ministries of the Church (Revelation 1:6, 5:10, 19:10, Acts 2:17, 1 Corinthians 14:1,3-5, 24-25, 29, 39)"*.

i've been really challenged afresh this morning by reading psalm 132 where david says...

"I will not go home;
I will not let myself rest.
I will not let my eyes sleep
nor close my eyelids in slumber
until I find a place to build a house for the Lord,
a sanctuary for the Mighty One of Israel.”

i need to test my own heart again in my devotion to seeing our lives becoming that dwelling place for the Lord. paul prayed that Christ would be more and more at home in the hearts of the ephesian church as they trusted in Him (ephesians 3vs17). how desperately will i pursue ridding myself of all that would hinder Christ being Lord of my life?

God wants that dwelling not just in our individual lives, but in His body as a whole. the Lord has been reminding me of His heart to make His church (ephesians 2 vs 19-22) a place saturated with communion with Him through worship and prayer. i long to see an awakened and revived bride of Christ in my generation. i long to see the church alive with love for Jesus, assured of her salvation and identity in Him. i long to see the Spirit move when we gather and when we scatter, so much so that we are clothed with the power and humility of Christ Jesus. i long to see a community set apart from the world. are we hearing Christ's call today - “Look! I stand at the door and knock. If you hear my voice and open the door, I will come in, and we will share a meal together as friends." (revelation 3). that is what the restoration of the tabernacle of david is about - restoring a place in our own lives and in the church where Christ is at home, remembering that "He inhabits the PRAISE of His people" (psalm 22). His home is found where we praise Him.

sorry this has been a rather messy and full on blog. just splurted out all my thoughts at once!

i'd encourage all 3 of you who read this blog to set aside some time this Christmas to sit before the Lord and ask Him to re-envision you on what specific things He has put in your hands to carry to this generation from the Father. ask Him where He wants you to be, what He wants you to do and how you can do it best for His glory. and believe He will answer and that He rewards those who earnestly seek Him.

Father,
let me see what You see
let me hear what You hear
let me know what You know
let me go where You go.

*(thanks to www.zionsong.org for the material about the tabernacle of david!)

let the weak speak

2008-12-15T14:46:00.003Z

the way God's Kingdom works blows my mind. the world says that power is held by the strong, that authority is in the hands of the able and gifted. King Jesus said "blessed are the poor in spirit...theirs is the Kingdom of God". the Kingdom belongs to the poor, the humble, the weak. the Kingdom belongs to those who know how much they need God. paul said that God puts the treasure of the gospel into "jars of clay" (2 corinthians 4 vs7), vessels willing to be moulded, broken and poured out. i would go as far as saying that often worldly strength, talent and initiative often take away from the beautiful simplicity of the good news. God chose jars of clay because its in jars of clay that the contrast between the Treasure (Him) and the treasure holder (us) is most clearly seen. God chooses the weak things of this world, the foolish things to shame the wise (1 corinthians 1 vs 18). i think in the western church (and in my own life) we too often try to dress up the presence of God or try to disguise His presence coming through emotionalism and fancyness. some of this stuff is really good in inspiring us to pursue and encounter the Lord, but i believe we need to acknowledge that the more we use human strength to try and achieve things that only His strength can achieve in His Kingdom, the more we will be fighting against the will of our King.

in matthew 6 Jesus says to His disciples, "dont be afraid little flock, for it gives My Father great joy to give you the Kingdom". the Father, the Lord of heaven and earth, the Beginning, the End - this Great God of justice and power puts His Kingdom in the hands of a "little flock". He entrusts the outworking of His reign on the earth to broken people, who like sheep wander astray, get lost, need constant provision and depend utterly on the guidance of their Shepherd. it gives Him delight to give the Kingdom to sheep! its in the failures and fears of the sheep that the Shepherd's beauty and goodness is most displayed.

in an age where leadership, even in the church, is so often given to the talented and strong i think God is calling us back to His mandate for His Kingdom leaders. to be like john the baptist in making ourselves less and less so that He can become greater and greater. i want to be part of a generation of leaders who depend so wholeheartedly on God's empowering and strength that all our courage and bravery, all of our strategy and initiative is drawn from intimacy and communion with Him.

God isnt looking for the strong. He has all the Strength. He is Strength. He is looking for the weak and willing. ones who are poor in spirit, but rich in love and devotion for Him, who will go to whatever cost to see Him glorified in these weak, perishing bodies, because we know that He alone is truly glorious. boldness is found in weakness that looks to Jesus, because its in our weakness that His power is made perfect (2 corinthians 12).

for the King and for His Kingdom. let the weak speak.

blessed

2008-12-13T01:24:00.003Z

"But blessed is the man who trusts in the LORD,
whose confidence is in him.

He will be like a tree planted by the water
that sends out its roots by the stream.
It does not fear when heat comes;
its leaves are always green.
It has no worries in a year of drought
and never fails to bear fruit." (Jeremiah 17 vs 7-8)

i am so blessed. it has nothing to do with me. its all the mercy of a God who calls Himself my Heavenly Father. thankYou Papa.

God is for us.

2008-12-08T11:23:00.003Z

my Father has been awakening a reality in me over the week or so. on a few different occassions ive felt massively drawn to 2 separate passages that hold the same truth and have spoken to me really deeply.

the first is from romans 8...

"What shall we say about such wonderful things as these? If God is for us, who can ever be against us? Since he did not spare even his own Son but gave him up for us all, won’t he also give us everything else? Who dares accuse us whom God has chosen for his own? No one—for God himself has given us right standing with himself. Can anything ever separate us from Christ’s love? Does it mean he no longer loves us if we have trouble or calamity, or are persecuted, or hungry, or destitute, or in danger, or threatened with death? (As the Scriptures say, “For your sake we are killed every day; we are being slaughtered like sheep.”) No, despite all these things, overwhelming victory is ours through Christ, who loved us." (vs 31-33,35-37)

i dont think i'll ever fully grasp the beauty of these words. here was a man who had known trouble and calamity, persecution, hunger, lonliness, danger, threats. and yet here he is boldly declaring God is for us. i love the strength with which paul says "who dares accuse us". the enemy will always do all he can to heap condemnation and fear on us. he tries to crush and snuff out true God pursuers. but God is our Great Defender. He is our Great High Priest, our Great Deliverer. when satans threats and accusations wage war against our sinful souls, our Jesus arises with power and jealousy and charges satan "I, the LORD, reject your accusations, satan. yes, the LORD, who has chosen jerusalem, rebukes you. this man is like a burning stick that has been snatched from a fire" (zechariah 3 vs 2). that blows my mind. the grace of God. that He would choose to rise up for the sake of me, a sinner who He calls loved, chosen adopted, royal, cherished, and give "overwhelming victory" even in the midst of much suffering. our God is truly for us.

the second is from psalm 56 (pretty cool story, i was praying and asking God for a scripture before i was about to go and have a quite scary conversation with somone and felt psalm 56 dropped in my heart and then looked at where id opened my bible a few minutes earlier and there it was!)...

"You keep track of all my sorrows.
You have collected all my tears in your bottle.
You have recorded each one in your book.
My enemies will retreat when I call to you for help.
This I know: God is on my side!
I praise God for what he has promised;
Yes, I praise the Lord for what he has promised.
I trust in God, so why should I be afraid?
What can mere mortals do to me?" (vs 8-11)

last week in one of my education lectures the lecturer was talking about how children who have a loving relationship with their parents feel safe and secure to explore the world and make mistakes. this passage speaks so much of that childlike confidence in our Heavenly Father - "this i know: God is on my side!". that is a huge revelation that so many Christ-followers need today. it doesnt mean things will always be easy or go our way. the verse before this one talk about david having many sorrows, tears and enemies. but once again, despite opposition, the truth of God's faithfulness creates prevailing, overcoming faith that can stand firm in the face of terror and say "God is for me, who can be against me?". sometimes i think ive got to do what david does in this passage. he asks his own soul a reassuring question - "why should i be afraid?". i need to trust God to lead me, to vindicate me, to be my Confidence. i need to entirely submit and lay down my reputation for Him, knowing that "He resists the proud but gives grace to the humble" and that "when i bow down before the Lord and admit my dependence on Him, He will lift me up and give me honour" (james 4 vs 6, 10). perfect love will cast out all fear. fear of the future, failure, rejection. because perfect love is rooted in faith that God is for us and not against us. hallelujah. we are more than conquerers through Jesus who loves us.

john the beloved// part 3.

2008-12-04T22:46:00.000Z

..."one of His disciples, whom Jesus loved, was reclining at the table, close to Jesus"... john 13 vs 23

john knew he was loved. he knew he was cherished, delighted in, adored. and because he knew he was loved, he came close. knowing he was loved wasnt an arrogant claim. it was a claim born out of revelation of the heart of His Father, through Jesus, for him. john had once been full of arrogance, requesting that he sit next to Jesus in His heavenly Kingdom (mark 10vs35-45). but by the time he wrote this gospel his heart had been softened and his arrogance tamed and humbled by unfailing love. i need that.

here we join john in one of his proudest moments. he didnt let past failures stop his pursuit of intimacy with Christ. he didnt let the fact the other disciples were probably looking at him, wondering what he was doing, hinder his passion to get near to Jesus. he didnt let present confusion or uncertainty diminish his desire for the Son of Man. here he was, sitting in on probably the most significant meal in history, full of questions about his Master's words "I tell you the truth- one of you, one of My own will betray Me", but all the while resting in His love. one of the amazing things about this amazing situation is that Jesus shares the secrets of His Father's sovereignty with this lovesick disciple...

"Leaning back against Jesus, he asked him, "Lord, who is it?"
Jesus answered, "It is the one to whom I will give this piece of bread when I have dipped it in the dish." Then, dipping the piece of bread, he gave it to Judas Iscariot, son of Simon" (vs 25-26)

john leaned back onto His Saviour. ive been trying to imagine how john was saying that question. was he startled and scared by Jesus' words, asking the question with searching worry? was he angered that one of his 'brothers' would do such a thing to the Messiah, asking the question with righteous indignation? i dont know. but i know that he asked with absolute confidence that this One who was letting him lean on Him would answer. in this moment, john had access not only to the secrets of God and His plan, but to the very heartbeat of God in flesh, the very breath and scent of this Servant King.

what i find most amazing about all of this is that john - the disciple who came closest to Jesus, who knew he was loved deeply and passionately by Jesus, who leaned on Jesus and lived out the first commandment - this john, was the only one to remain loyal to Christ in His darkest hour. all others scattered and abandoned Him at the cross. but john's love is shown in the fact he first came close to His Lord and then stayed close to Him. he was faithful. his devotion in the secret place poured out into standing for Jesus when the rest of the world was mocking Him. and because of that we call him, "the disciple Jesus loved".

john the beloved// part 2.

2008-12-01T15:10:00.000Z

i am so fascinated by what john called this thing we try to live out everyday. "the SUFFERING and KINGDOM and patient ENDURANCE that are ours in Jesus" (revelation 1 vs 9). when john had to sum up this life he had lived seeking to follow and honour the love of Christ, he chose the words suffering, Kingdom and endurance. i think we can learn alot about the way we are supposed to live our lives from what john called christianity. we need more disciples willing to pay the price, to carry their cross and suffer with Jesus. we need more signs of the Kingdom breaking in in power and love. and we need endurance to finish this race well so that our love will not grow cold.

these 3 things are all intrinsically linked. the book of acts is amazing at showing us that- the early church seems to go through a constant cycle-

persecution (suffering) ... power (kingdom) ... prayer (patient endurance).

john the beloved// part 1.

2008-11-27T14:24:00.005Z

i'm going to do a bit of a series of posts on one of my favourite bible people- the apostle john. he was a legend. this is sort of starting backwards...

----------------------

life gets messy sometimes. relationships, work, worries, questions, betrayals, tragedies, illness. sometimes we can feel overwhelmed by the sheer weight of stuff, the intensity of lots of different little battles.

i imagine life had been a bit messy for john. years spent serving his heart out for the One who had transformed him from a 'son of thunder' into a 'beloved disciple'. he'd seen his share of crazy things in his life time. his Master, born of a virgin, proclaiming God's Kingdom come to earth - crucified. johns world mustve fallen apart as he stood before that cross, the only loayal disciple to the Lord. then in what mustve been an emotional roller-coaster, his deep grief turns to ecstatic, sudden joy, just as Jesus had promised. His Jesus rises again. nails could never hold the Son of Man. the grave couldnt handle Him. death couldnt hold Him back. johns life is forever transformed, again, as he suddenly realises he has found Life itself, meaning, purpose, in the scarred hands of a Carpenter from Nazareth. no more was john a fiery fisherman. from what we know, he became an incredible evangelist and pastor. he was one of the foundations of the church. life didnt get any less messy from that point in. he wouldve witness the arrest of many dear friends, the killing of his brother and other church leaders. he wouldve experienced constant persecution, been under pressure to disciple thousands of new believers. this saint had seen it all.

fast forward to johns last few days on this earth. once again life mustve been messy - stranded, abandoned on an island called patmos. but through all the mess, john knew what he was to set his heart on and what followed from this decision of his will was the most amazing revelation of the Person of Christ that we have in the bible. what was this decision of the will that in the midst of the mess john set his heart on?

"It was the Lord’s Day, and I was worshiping in the Spirit" (revelation 1 vs 11).

in the midst of a messy and hard situation john made the choice to worship in the Spirit. to commune and fellowship with the Living God. as he lifted his eyes, he found himself caught up into a vision where He saw His transfigured Master, the King of kings, Lord of lords, the First, Last, Alpha, Omega, Beginning, End. the Lamb, the Lion, the Faithful, the True. he saw JESUS. i'm thankful that john chose to worship that day. i'm even more thankful that God allowed him access beyond the veil into eternity so that we could benefit from what he saw, because "blessed is the one who reads the words of this prophecy, and blessed are those who hear it and take to heart what is written in it, because the time is near." (revelation 1 vs 3)

when life gets busy and messy we need to lift our eyes. we need a revelation of Jesus Christ. thats the earthy reality of what the book of revelation is all about - a weary, faithful saint coming before His Lord in worship, just to worship and receiving a revelation of the Majesty, Mystery and Magnificance of his Saviour and His plan. obviously the book of revelation is also much more. but sometimes we make it too much more. we forget the simplicity of what it is, summed up in the very first words..."The revelation of Jesus Christ" (revelation 1 vs 1) - who He is, what He's done, what He will do. its all about Him. john knew that. because of that, he'll always be my favourite disciple. because i need constant reminding in the midst of mess that a revelation of Jesus Christ is all i need. He is more than enough.

waiting, wrestling, wounded in the wilderness

2008-11-27T00:11:00.005Z

the wilderness is one of the most significant places in the bible. its the place where john the baptist spent years, seeking the Lord in prayer and fasting before being released into his calling to be a messenger to prepare the way for the Coming King. its the place king david spent years being chased, pursued by his enemies, before being released into his anointing as the chosen king of israel. its the place where some of the most precious songs in the bible were birthed. its the place where moses spent years being reformed so that he could be the leader God had chosen him to be- the one who would release God's people from captivity and lead them...into the wilderness. its the place jacob received the revelation of the gateway to heaven, the place where he wrestled with God till daybreak. its the place Jesus was led "by the Holy Spirit" to be tested and tempted by the devil for 40 days before being sent out to be the Saviour, the Healer, the Kingdom Builder. in revelation, the people of God are pictured as a woman, "led into the desert to a place prepared for her by God, where she might be taken care of". theres something so special about the wilderness.

if theres one place in the bible where this whole thing of waiting is most obviously seen, its the wilderness. israel had to wait 40 years, a whole generation, in the wilderness before being given the land they had been promised as an inheritance. they learned waiting through waiting. patience was formed in their hearts through failure, idolatary and compromise.

the wilderness is God's place. its where He wins our hearts. its where He can truly be the Potter and we are truly the clay. its where all our defences are down. where we're desperate, vulnerable, dry and empty. God loves to refresh, regenerate, restore. but to do that, He must first lead us into a dry place. time and time again in the scriptures, God is pictured as leading His people into a dry, barren, desolate place where He can have their full attention, where He can mould and mend their hearts.

im amazed by how God uses the wilderness to form hearts of worship in us. its what he did to david. i want to really quickly look at 2 of the most stunning verses in the bible about the desert, and what the wilderness does to us as individual lovers of God and as the bride of Christ.

"Who is this coming up from the desert
leaning on her Lover?"
(song of songs 8vs5)

as we wait and wrestle with Jesus in the desert, as we fight against our own sin, the enemy and the world, we'll often find we get wounded. jacob never walked without a limp after his encounter with God in the wilderness. he was wounded for the rest of his life. but, he had seen God face to face. he had touched Him, embraced Him. jacob was never the same after this. its when i wrestle with God in the place of prayer that i often find myself coming out with a limp. am i saying that God's presence isnt healing, restoring, refreshing, transforming? not at all, it is all those things. but as we take our falleness before the throne of Grace and Mercy we will find that God will tell us to sacrifice things that hurt for us to give up. but God wounds us not so we are hurt. it is for the purpose of us leaning on Him. the goal is that when we come up out of the wilderness we will no longer be walking on our own, in our strength. we will be dependent utterly on His grace, His strength, His power made perfect in weakness.

"Therefore I am now going to allure her;
I will lead her into the desert
and speak tenderly to her.

There I will give her back her vineyards,
and will make the Valley of Achor a door of hope.
There she will sing as in the days of her youth,
as in the day she came up out of Egypt.

"In that day," declares the LORD,
"you will call me 'my husband';
you will no longer call me 'my master."
(hosea 2vs14-16)

God 'allures' His bride into the wilderness, hidden away from the world, just to be with Him so He can speak to her 'tenderly'. i love that. He draws us to the place of dependence. He takes us to our weakness and in that place we also find His might. i believe this passage may be speaking profoundly prophetically over the western church at the moment. we need to walk in the promise of singing to Him as we did in the days of our youth, times of revival and renewal from our heritage. we need to recognise that maybe God is leading us to the desert so He can purify us. but it takes us being willing to be allured there. to forsake all the distractions of wealth, entertainment, education. these arent at all bad things. but sometimes God wants to strip us back till we have nothing but Himself. it takes us being willing to listen to His voice and find that He wants to restore our vineyards to us. the promise at the end of the desert place is amazing in both verses. to put them together, we will come up out of the desert, "leaning on our Beloved, calling Him Husband". intimacy. thats what the desert forges in us in a word. through purifying our affections, desires and thoughts, He forms intimacy in us. He just wants us to walk closer to Him, more in step with His Kingdom, Sovereign will.

the wilderness. next time i find myself dry, confused, overwhelmed, empty, weary, i need to remind myself that God leads me to that place so that i realise im nothing without Him. He takes me to that place so that i can throw myself at His feet, onto His shoulders in trusting prayer and love. till im utterly undivided in my pursuit of Him. right now i feel like im in a bit of a wilderness. confused, weary, dry. but leaning on Him, thirsting for Him. may His Spirit stir that thirst in me evermore.

highly esteemed by God.

2008-11-25T19:22:00.002Z

one of the things i cherish most about the bible is the way i live my life through it. the way the stories of God pursuers throughout history becomes my story. the way their struggles and victories mirror mine.

one man who ive related with alot recently is daniel.

daniel had every worldly reason to give up. he was exiled to a land that was not his own. he was forced into an educational system that would have sought to undermine his faith in the God of israel. he was forced into a high position of leadership that probably would've been burdensome and time-consuming. he was falsely accused, probably very lonely at times and went through seasons of intense mourning. but he was so faithful to God.

i think its significant that daniel was from the tribe of judah (daniel 1vs6). the word judah is hebrew for "praise". from the tribe of praise, this man of God stood for His King in a foreign nation, in an uncomfortable and testing environment. i love his commitment to praying 3 times a day. its something ive been trying to adopt into my uni devotional lifestyle- its hard. daniel models it amazingly, utter devotion to his Lord. im beginning to learn that true maturity is found in always running to God first and only. one of the most beautiful verses in daniel is 6vs10 where it talks about daniel "learning that the law had been signed" to forbid the worship of the Living God, redirecting the praise to darius. it says that the next thing daniel did was to go home and kneel in his upstairs room. daniel refused to bow to the gods of the day. he refused to give his love to any other. that is a lesson for me and the church in this generation. the world wants us to bow to intellectualism, success, money, relationships, fear. we need to know that we too are called to this foreign land (1 peter 2vs11), from the tribe of praise (1 peter 2vs9a) to stand for our King and declare His greatness (1 peter 2vs9b).

it was said of david that he was "a man after God's own heart" (acts 13vs22). it was said of moses that he was "more humble than anyone else on the face of the earth" (numbers 12vs3). it was said of noah that he was a "righteous man, blameless among the people of his time, and he walked with God" (genesis 6vs9).

but it was said of daniel that he was "highly esteemed", "very precious" and "greatly loved" by God (daniel 10vs11). imagine having that sort of affirmation from God. imagine the King of heaven, eyes blazing with jealous fire, body radiating with eternal Light, voice roaring like a vast multitude or a rushing river...imagine this King, Jesus, the Holy One, saying that over your life. over my life. "owen, you are very precious in My Fathers sight. you are highly esteemed in the courts of heaven. you are greatly loved and cherished by the One who you were created for". it came to daniel in his lowest point where he had been mourning and fasting for 3 weeks. thats intense prayer. intense, heart-wrenching intercession (daniel 9). and yet in the midst of that he received a revelation of the majesty of Christ that made him fall "as though he was dead" and a revelation of the deep love of Christ that made him "stand to his feet". that is the pattern we need to follow. knowing we are cherished- standing for our Jesus in this world.

i want to live like daniel. faithful and steadfast to the end. through exile, lions dens, accusation, prophetic messages that are scary to deliver - through it all, to be found faithful and on my knees. i want it to be said of my life that i am one who "worships continually" (daniel 6vs20).

Holy Spirit, help me.

loving others.

2008-11-23T14:11:00.004Z

since being in cardiff uni, i've picked up the nickname "pastor owen" from some friends here. i think, in all honesty, i may have been the one who suggested it!

its really got me thinking about the way i am towards people. the word 'pastor' comes from the latin which means shepherd. a shepherd is one who loves, one who nurtures, one who protects, one who sacrifices him/herself for the sake of those in their care. the church today is hurting and lost and wounded in so many areas. we need more true pastors who will love people towards God.

check out this passage from john 21...

15When they had finished eating, Jesus said to Simon Peter, "Simon son of John, do you truly love me more than these?"
"Yes, Lord," he said, "you know that I love you."
Jesus said, "Feed my lambs."
16Again Jesus said, "Simon son of John, do you truly love me?"
He answered, "Yes, Lord, you know that I love you."
Jesus said, "Take care of my sheep."
17 The third time he said to him, "Simon son of John, do you love me?"
Peter was hurt because Jesus asked him the third time, "Do you love me?" He said, "Lord, you know all things; you know that I love you."
Jesus said, "Feed my sheep."

this has so challenged me the past few days. Jesus knows peters heart. Jesus knows that though peter has failed, peter will do anything for His Lord. every time Jesus is asking the question "do you love Me?", peters response was an act of devotion. and what is Jesus' response to peters declaration of love? ... "pastor My church". God calls those who say with all their hearts "yes Lord, You know i love You" to love His people. to look after His flock. this isnt just a sunday thing, or an up the front thing. i believe there is a distinction between those who are called into full time "pastoral ministry" and those who are meant to follow those leaders God has appointed. but the call to love God's church and nurture it to the praise of His name is to all of us. Jesus said the greatest commandment was to love God with everything and to love others like we love ourselves.

so often i dont love others with the intensity and care that i should. and so often i love to be loved not to love. i dont take enough time to find out how people really are, to offer to pray for them and to give them my full attention. one of my heros is a lady called heidi baker who is a missionary to mozambique. she cares for those around her- orphans, homeless, widows- like no one ive ever seen. one thing she always says is that christian discipleship is as simple as loving the one in front of us. i cant imagine what it would look like in my life if i was so in love with Jesus, so emptied of all but love that His love would pour over into the lives of others. not just compassion for others- we need that too! but love in motion, love that acts, love that serves, love that stoops down to the trash of broken lives and lifts them up.

and what about loving the lost? in the above passage, Jesus tells peter to look after His people. but Jesus also said "I have other sheep that are not of this sheep pen. I must bring them also. They too will listen to my voice, and there shall be one flock and one shepherd." (john 10vs16). He told us to love our enemies (matthew 5vs44). we are to love everyone as if they were Jesus' sheep too. its His kindness, often shown through us, that leads to repentance (romans 2vs4).

i can remember one time in the last few months, i wrote down all the descriptions of love found in 1 corinthians 13 - patient, kind, rejoicing in truth, persevering etc. i asked questions of my own heart about the extent to which i was being those things towards God. was i patient in my love for Him? was i kind with the amount of time i gave to Him? was i always trusting, always hoping, always persevering? its a pretty humbling thing to test our relationship with God against. even more humbling when you check how you're doing with loving others too! selfless love is pretty hard and not very glamorous. but its what Jesus calls us to everyday.

it all starts with knowing how much He loves us and delights in us. loving Him and others flows from that.

here's a quote that sums up what i've been trying to say better in a few words than ive done in paragraphs...

"Love has no meaning if it isnt shared. Love has to be put into action. You have to share love without expectation, do something for love itself, not what you may receive. Love in action is what gives us grace. We have been created for greater things...to love and be loved. Love is love- to love a person without any conditions, without any expectations. Small things, done in great love, bring joy and peace. To love, it is necessary to give. To give, it is necessary to be free from selfishness"
Mother Teresa

success.

2008-11-22T22:24:00.004Z

its no secret. every single one of us has the desire to in some way be successful. to be known. to be cherished, accepted, adored. we want to know that what we're doing is worth something and achieving something. we want to know that the pursuits and passions we pour our hearts and lives into are counting towards a goal.

what is it that makes christians, lovers and followers of Jesus, successful? is there even a measurement for success when God sees us clothed in His Son, adopted as dearly loved children because of grace.

i believe there is..

john 15.

Jesus, hours before facing the horror of the cross, shares the secrets of His heart and of the Trinity with His nearest and dearest. "those who abide in Me, and I in them, will produce much fruit...this is for My Father's glory". Jesus is saying here that the mark of a successful life is fruit. everything else will be "pruned" and "purified" in this life and the next. fruit is produced from being with and in Jesus.

one of my friends told me an amazing quote the other day which i wrote down as soon as he said it. it resonated so much with the desire in me to live the whole-hearted, abandoned, Kingdom seeking, world forsaking lifestyle that Christ calls us to. he said "this is success- to labour with Christ in and for love of Him". thats what its all about. labouring with Him. walking with Him. Jesus said "I only do the things I see My Father doing". we need to be a generation of worshippers who spend so much time with our Lord that the overflow of our lives is to bless and serve what He is doing. whether that be labouring with Christ in the secret place of prayer, labouring with Christ in preaching to thousands, labouring with Christ in feeding the hungry and befriending the friendless, labouring with Christ in sharing His love with those who are far from Him, labouring with Christ in sharing the burdens of His heart. taking up the cross, labouring with Jesus.

its time that we truly were a people who are "seeking first the Kingdom" (matt 6). its so hard to live, in choices, in affections, in motives, in words, in attitudes, in actions, in how we spend our time and money. but God gives grace. its only through His Spirit's empowering, for without Him we "can do nothing" (john 15).

thats success. thats what i want to pour my life on. abiding in Him and producing fruit. for His glory.

welcome

2008-11-21T14:54:00.002Z

so, it looks like i've started a blog :).

just a little introduction...my name is owen. i'm 19. i'm a worship leader. i'm a theology student. i live in wales.

after being encouraged to get one of these things by one of my good friends (www.mikeaddis.blogspot.com), i've made the step of signing up. this is just going to be a space where i'm going to share some of my heart, my thoughts, what i'm wrestling with, what i'm rejoicing in, the songs i'm writing, what i'm praying for and the things God is teaching me and blessing me with. more than anything else, this is just going to be a place where i can express and journal what striving to love and serve Jesus with everything is looking like in my life at the moment. when its all said and done, all of this is for Him and about Him.

hopefully i'll get round to posting some songs too. that'd be niice.

why "from the waiting"? sounds a bit spooky and dramatic doesnt it.

one of the things God has been teaching me over the last few months is the importance of posturing our hearts before Him in such a way that we are patient and willing before Him. patiently, passionately, willingly waiting for Him to speak, to reveal Himself, to shower us in love, to break our hearts, to mould us, to draw us closer. im not very good at waiting. give me a guitar and i'll sing my heart out to my Heavenly Dad for hours. but ask me to wait and i wont know what to do! waiting is painful. waiting is hard. waiting takes bravery. waiting unveils all within us that shouldnt be in us...sin, distraction, wrong motives. but waiting is what worshippers all throughout the bible did. its in the place of being open and listening to His still, small voice that the Spirit ignites fire in our hearts to burn and blaze in love for Him again.

psalm 27...david, being chased by fierce enemies through the wilderness commands his own soul to "be strong and take heart and wait for the Lord".

lamentations 3...jeremiah in his darkest hour finds hope in waiting before God in silent submission and trust..."The Lord is good to those who depend on him, to those who search for him. So it is good to wait quietly for salvation from the Lord. And it is good for people to submit at an early age to the yoke of his discipline"

habakkuk 2...habakkuk, a confused and broken-hearted prophet climbs up his watchtower to wait for God's response to his heartfelt cry of complaint. the response brings about one of the most beautiful chapters of praise and pictures of God's power in the OT.

luke 10...mary, sitting at Jesus' feet in adoration, doesnt bring a nice worship song or a list of prayers and petitions. she just listens and waits. Jesus says "mary has found the one thing that matters, and it will not be taken away from her". the one thing that matters. being with Jesus. adoring. listening. waiting.

galations 1vs15-17...the apostle paul spends months, maybe even years "not consulting with any human being", but obediently spending time with Jesus, receiving revelation so that he can be a vessel to bring the good news to the gentiles.

acts 2 (my favourite at the moment)...Jesus gives His the disciples the great commission, the command to go into all the world and bring the Kingdom of God into the reality of earth. but not before He tells them to "wait in jerusalem for the Gift of the Father", the Holy Spirit. theyre gathered in a hot and sweaty upper room. praying, waiting, worshipping. in an instant, the Spirit of God falls, flames of fire ignite the disciples lives and they "receive power to be His witnesses". thousands are added to their number. the church is birthed.

things happen when we wait on God in prayer, bible study and worship. its in that place that heavenly vision is birthed, kingdom strategy is released and the power to be His hands and feet to this broken world commissions these weak human bodies. so i want this blog to be about things that have been birthed out of a relationship with the living God, resting in His presence and listening to Him.

ciao for now x